


Across Party Lines

by didntwanderstillgotlost



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Enemies to Lovers, Fluff, Fluffy Smut, Homophobic comments, Love Confessions, M/M, Mild Smut, Minor Sam/Jessica, Politician Chuck, Politician Mary, Politics AU, Secret relationship (kinda) (they tried), teen!Sam
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-21
Updated: 2021-02-14
Packaged: 2021-03-08 19:48:25
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 29
Words: 35,989
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27132043
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/didntwanderstillgotlost/pseuds/didntwanderstillgotlost
Summary: Mary Winchester and Charles Novak are the Democratic and Republican nominees in the 2016 Presidential Race.What happens when their sons meet and fall in love?
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Comments: 87
Kudos: 263





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> All right y'all. I don't usually post new stuff at 3 in the morning, but I can't sleep and I've been sitting on this one for a while and I need to share it. So here we are.
> 
> So here's what happened. I read Red, White, and Royal Blue a few times (and listened to the audio book more times than I can count. Seriously I can quote the entire book word for word and I cannot say a single bad thing about it. Please read or listen to it!) and then I read The State of Us (not that great, but not the point) and it got me thinking and since the politics in this country have completely gone to shit, I decided to write a Destiel politics AU. And it takes place in 2016 so I can pretend the last 4 years didn't happen.
> 
> Hope you all enjoy!

Dean straightened his tie and watched as his mother made her opening remarks. He took a deep breath to steady his nerves. He really didn’t want to be there. Honestly, he would’ve preferred to be  _ anywhere _ else. But he was the oldest, and if Sam could miss some classes to be there, then he could plaster on a fake smile and pretend he actually wanted this. Next to him, Sam was fidgeting with the cuffs of his suit.

“Stop,” Dean hissed.

“It’s itchy,” Sam hissed back.

“I know, but it’s only for another twenty minutes. Stop.” Sam fixed him with Bitchface #17, but stilled his nervous movements. Dean sighed quietly. Twenty more minutes. All he had to do was walk out on the stage, smile, wave, and act like he didn’t hate this. He didn’t, really. He was proud of everything his mother had accomplished and he had even helped with her run for Senate, but President? He didn’t want that kind of attention. For himself or for Sam, who was still in high school.

Dean tried to listen while his mother gave her speech, but he had heard it so many times already. Her platform was good and she would definitely make a notable difference to the country if she won. Dean would be proud. But nothing would change the fact that he didn’t like the spotlight. His entire life would change if she won. He bit his bottom lip and shook his head, trying to keep himself from spiralling. He was the oldest. He had to be strong for Sam.

“Dean!” Pamela snapped quietly.

“Sorry,” Dean muttered. He ran his tongue over his bottom lip, checking to make sure he hadn’t broken the skin. He hadn’t. Pamela rolled her eyes. Dean tucked his hands into his pockets and waited for his and Sam’s cue to walk out. He glanced at the pin stuck in his lapel and smiled just a little. Not for nothing, at least his mother didn’t make him hide who he was. He heard his mother wrap up her speech and then there was an explosion of cameras flashing and Pamela was pushing Dean and Sam closer to the edge of the stage. Dean took three calming breaths and turned on his customer service smile. He should probably rename it his politics smile, but that didn’t sound nearly as friendly. Sam was smiling, too, but it was much more genuine.

Dean stood to his mother’s right, while Sam stood to her left. She put an arm around each of them, and Dean relaxed a little at the familiar comfort of her hand on the small of his back. No matter how bad it got, his mother’s presence always calmed him. The photos went quickly and soon the three of them were sitting in the green room backstage. Mary Winchester flipped her blonde curls over her shoulder and smiled at her sons.

“How’s work going, Dean?” Dean shrugged. Now that he was out of that suit, he felt much more relaxed. He leaned back against the arm of the couch and stretched his legs out so his socked feet were resting on Sam’s leg. Sam shot him Bitchface #4, but didn’t say anything.

“Good, I guess. Bobby said he might promote me to head mechanic.”

“That’s great, sweetheart! And what about you, Sam? How’s school?”

“Boring,” Sam complained, shoving Dean’s feet off his leg. “I already know everything. It’s easy.” Dean couldn’t help grinning. His little brother was a genius. Of course he was bored with high school.

“Have you started applying for colleges yet?”

“Just the local ones,” Sam said, “but I think I wanna try for Stanford.” He looked at Dean like he was silently asking for permission. Dean sat up enough to ruffle his brother’s ridiculously long hair.

“Go for it, kiddo.”

“Dean, stop!” Sam shook his head and slapped Dean’s hand away. Dean laughed. “I’m not a kid anymore. I’m almost eighteen.”

“Yeah, well, you’re still my little brother. If you wanna take a shot at Stanford, do it. They’d be lucky to have you.” Sam beamed at him and even his mother smiled.

“I’m glad you boys are doing okay.” Dean took a closer look at her. Now that she wasn’t wearing layers of makeup and standing under glaring spotlights, he could see that she looked tired. More tired than normal.

“How’s the campaign going?” He probably should’ve asked sooner, but he was trying to keep his distance. He was trying to put off the inevitable for as long as possible.

“Very good, considering,” Mary replied on a sigh. “Charles Novak is a force to be reckoned with, I’ll give him that.”

“He’s a prick,” Dean muttered under his breath. He knew his mother shared his sentiments, but he also knew he was supposed to watch his language while he was on the campaign trail. Charles Novak was the lead Republican candidate. He had been a Senator for Illinois going on fifteen years and his wife was some kind of high-powered business lawyer. His platform was shitty, his personality was worse, and Dean really,  _ really _ wanted to punch the guy in the face.

“You can take him, Mom,” Sam said and Dean looked over. The fire in Sam’s eyes was fierce. He really thought their mom could win. More importantly, he looked like he  _ wanted _ her to win, which was more than Dean could say. There was a knock on the door and Charlie poked her head in.

“The car’s ready, Ms. Winchester.”

“Thank you, Charlie.” Charlie disappeared into the hall. Dean sat up and pulled his boots on. Once they were all in the car, Benny lowered the partition.

“Where to?”

“Drop me at the garage,” Dean said.

“I have to meet my study group at the library,” Sam said.

“Drop him off first.” Benny nodded and raised the partition. Dean settled back against the leather seat and gazed out the tinted window. He watched Kansas City go by in blurs of bright lights and gray streets. He missed Lawrence. He missed living somewhere where everyone knew each other and everyone was friendly. Benny stopped outside the library and Sam climbed out. He slung his backpack over his shoulder and leaned in the window.

“You’re gonna pick me up later, right?”

“Yeah, I gotcha, Sammy.”

“It’s Sam,” Sam grumbled as he walked away. Dean smirked a little at his brother’s indignation, but he felt a twinge of sadness, too. It felt like just yesterday he was carrying little Sammy on his shoulders, showing him how to tie his shoes, helping him with his homework. Sam had grown up far too quickly for Dean’s liking and now that he was in his last year of high school, Dean found himself reminiscing. Benny stopped again. Dean leaned across the seat and kissed his mother’s cheek before he got out.

“Hey, hotshot!” Jo yelled from the front desk when he walked in.

“Don’t start that shit,” Dean groaned. Every once in a while his mother’s car would drop him off at work and his coworkers would give him shit about it for the rest of the day. It wasn’t like he asked to be a politician’s son.

“Well, someone’s in a mood. Dog and pony show not go well?”

“Jo, seriously, don’t. Not today. I just wanna make money and go home.” Jo held up her hands in mock surrender.

“Fine, fine. You’re clocked in. Go help Bobby.” Dean detoured to the break room and locked his phone in his locker. Anyone who absolutely had to contact him while he was at work knew the garage number. He didn’t like any distractions while he was working. He walked into the garage and found Bobby under the hood of a mangled Toyota.

“The fuck happened here?” Bobby pulled his head out and stood up.

“Idjits need to learn how to read a stop sign.” Dean chuckled.

“All right.” He pushed up the sleeves of his flannel. “Let’s get to work.”


	2. Chapter 2

“Castiel, stand up straight!”

“Yes, ma’am,” Cas said on instinct. He straightened his shoulders and lifted his chin. Next to him, he could feel Gabriel struggling not to fidget. Anna was tucking a stray strand of her hair into her braid, Hannah was smoothing out the pleats of her skirt, Hester was adjusting Inias’s bowtie, and Michael and Raphael were talking quietly. Naomi was pacing around the room, critiquing every minor detail. Cas was fighting the urge to bolt out of the room, get in a cab, and disappear into a sea of people.

“You’re shaking,” Gabriel whispered and Cas took a deep breath, trying to steady his nerves. He wasn’t nervous about going on stage. He actually liked politics. He liked being in the spotlight. What he didn’t like was being forced to pretend he was something he wasn’t. A perfect little choir boy from a perfect Cathloic family. Gabriel was the only one in the family who shared his sentiments, and even though they never said it out loud, they were both waiting for a chance to get out. Maybe after their father lost the election.

Cas had no doubt he would. Maybe he had a few of the more radicalized Republicans on his side, but anyone with half a brain cell would be voting for Mary Winchester. Her platform was solid and she had a warm, inviting personality. Chuck’s platform was flimsy at best and his personality was about as appealing as nails scraping down a chalkboard.

“Quit it,” Gabriel hissed. Cas clenched his fists and gritted his teeth.

“I’m trying.” Gabriel squeezed Cas’s shoulder.

“Half an hour. Then we can go home and get drunk.” Cas cracked a smile.

“Deal.” Gabriel squeezed his shoulder again and Cas felt himself start to relax a little. He could do this. He could walk out there, stand with his family, smile for the pictures, and pretend he didn’t hate every second of it. He straightened his shoulders again and clasped his hands behind his back. Perfect posture, perfect smile, perfect son. Naomi walked by again and the look she gave him was a mix of disdain and contentment. She was pleased he looked the part, but there always had and always would be something off about him. He couldn’t change that and he had stopped trying to get Naomi’s approval years ago. He would settle for not getting reprimanded.

The thirty minutes went by faster than Cas expected. It was twenty minutes of standing around, ten minutes of posing for pictures with his family, and then they were all herded into the waiting cars. Cas ended up with Gabriel, Anna, and Hannah. The ride back to the house was quiet. Cas stared out the window and watched the city fly by. He had always liked cities. He liked the idea of being able to disappear into a sea of people. He could be anyone. He heard the beeping of the keypad as the driver punched in the security code. The system beeped once then the doors swung open. The car drove through and wound its way up to the six car garage. The driver parked and got out. He opened the door and helped Anna and Hannah get out. Gabriel followed and Cas was last. The girls disappeared into the first floor sitting room. Cas followed his brother up to his room.

“Freedom!” Gabriel declared, practically ripping his tie off. Cas laughed. He had to agree with that sentiment. He didn’t mind suits every once in a while, but ever since Chuck had started running for President, it felt like he lived in them. It was stifling. Cas stripped down to his boxers and put on a pair of worn in pajamas. He climbed up onto Gabriel’s king-sized bed and snuggled into the mountain of pillows. Gabriel joined him a few minutes later with two classes and a bottle of bourbon.

“I don’t think I can do this for another eight months,” Cas said, taking a long drink from his glass.

“We could run away,” Gabriel joked. Cas snorted.

“Sure. Where? Everyone in America knows our faces. We wouldn’t get very far.”

“Point,” Gabriel conceded. He took a sip of bourbon. “So, college?”

“With what time, Gabe? I have to be there to promote the wholesome Catholic family image. I’ve pretty much dropped out at this point.”

“So go back when this whole dog and pony show is over.”

“Maybe I will. Or maybe I’ll become an eccentric, reclusive writer somewhere in the Hymalaian Mountains.” Cas smiled fondly. He actually liked that idea.

“Come on, Cas. What happened to college and then law school and then politics?” Cas shrugged. That had been the plan for as long as he could remember. He would get a master’s degree in government, a bachelor’s degree in business, then he would go to law school and become a civil rights attorney. Eventually he would make a run for Senate.

“I dunno, Gabe. It’s a good dream, but…I don’t know if it’s realistic anymore.” Gabriel rolled his eyes and grabbed his laptop off his nightstand.

“Here.” He unlocked it and started typing. “You haven’t officially dropped out, right?”

“No.”

“So take your classes online.” Gabriel turned the screen so Cas could see. “That way you can do what you wanna do and still stay on the campaign trail with Dad.” Cas considered it. It actually wasn’t that bad of an idea.

“I’ll think about it,” he said and pushed Gabriel's laptop away. “Right now, I just wanna get drunk.” Gabriel put his laptop back where he’d found it and picked up his remote.

“We can do that. What are we watching?”

“I thought you said you had to watch  _ Downton Abbey _ ?” Gabriel scoffed.

“Please. I was just trying to fit in. How about  _ Sherlock _ ?” Cas made a face.

“Too much thinking.”

“The  _ Jurassic Park _ movies?”

“Too many inaccuracies.”

“ _ Dirk Gently’s Holistic Detective Agency _ ?” Cas grinned.

“There we go!” Gabriel shook his head fondly as he turned on the show. They sat mostly in silence as they drank and watched. Cas liked that the most about Gabriel. They could just sit and be together and it was nice. There was no pressure to make small talk and no awkward pauses. When they ran out of things to say or jokes to tell for the moment, the conversation just dropped. Neither one of them tried to keep it going just for the sake of not falling into silence.

“Where’s the next rally?” Cas asked after the third episode.

“Pittsburg, I think. The Winchesters are hosting one there, too. We’re supposed to meet the Winchesters beforehand for some kind of reaching across party lines, no hard feelings, smile, nod, and shake hands for the press thing, and then there’s a reception dinner or something after.”

“All of us?” Gabriel furrowed his brow.

“Yeah.” Cas groaned. The last thing he needed was to be anywhere near Dean Winchester. Cas knew, objectively, that he probably wasn’t a bad person, but something about Dean just irked him. It was a prickly, unsettling feeling under his skin. Maybe it was that Dean always looked so confident when he was on stage. Maybe it was that he had inherited his mother’s easy charm. Maybe it was that Dean didn’t have to hide who he was.

Chuck and Naomi made their share of comments whenever new pictures of the Winchesters made their rounds. So did the majority of his siblings. Cas just stared at the little pride flag pinned to Dean’s lapel. It was in the same place every time, no matter what suit he was wearing or which state he was in. Cas hated it because he knew he could never do something like that. His parents would disown him. Which actually wouldn’t be that bad except he needed them to pay for college. Once he was through law school he could finally be who he really was. But until then he had to keep playing his role.


	3. Chapter 3

“Be polite,” Pamela said for what had to be the eighteenth time in the last thirty minutes. Dean resisted the urge to roll his eyes. He wasn't necessarily  _ scared _ of his mother’s Chief of Staff, but he was fairly certain she was psychic, and she absolutely could and  _ would _ kick his ass without a second of hesitation.

“I got it, Pamela. I do know how to conduct myself like an adult.” Next to him, Sam snickered. Dean responded by kicking him in the back of the knee.

“Dean!” Pamela snapped and Dean sighed.

“Sorry. I’ll behave.” Pamela fixed him with a cold stare before she left the green room. “Hope you like walking home.” Sam rolled his eyes.

“You won’t leave me stranded.”

“Wanna bet?” Sam just gave him a  _ look _ . Dean shrugged and started bouncing his leg. He wanted to sit down, but Pamela would be pissed if he wrinkled his suit. He touched the pin on his lapel. He still remembered the day he asked his mother if he could wear it. He spent a week working up the courage to ask. He knew his mother didn’t care about his sexuality, but voters did and it was their opinions that mattered. So Dean had asked, fully expecting her to say no. But his mother had smiled and told him she never wanted him to hide who he was. He’d worn the pin to every single campaign stop since then and no one said a word. Pamela came back in.

“All right, boys. Photos.” Dean took a deep breath, smiled, and followed Pamela out the door. Sam was right behind him. The Novak siblings were standing with their parents, lined up eldest to youngest. Dean cringed internally at their matching outfits. They were all standing with perfect posture. They looked like porcelain dolls. He knew the two oldest, Michael and Raphel, and the two youngest boys, Gabriel and Castiel. His eyes stuck on Castiel. The whole family made him uncomfortable, but Castiel got under his skin. He was gorgeous. Buttoned up and pretentious, sure, but he was adorable and Dean hated it.

They all shook hands and posed for pictures and then Charles and Naomi, and Mary went into their respective green rooms to prep for their rallies. Dean turned to say something to Sam and found him engrossed in an animated conversation with Gabriel. He smiled a little then scanned the room for Castiel. He caught a glimpse of a tan trench coat slipping out the side door. Curiosity got the better of him and he followed. Dean found Castiel leaning against the side of the building. He had a vape pen between his teeth and he was angrily typing on his phone. Dean walked over and stood beside him. He took his vape out of his pocket and took a drag.

“Hey.”

“Hello, Dean.”

“You look like you’re enjoying this about as much as I am.”

“Yes, well, I don’t believe the intention was for us to enjoy this.”

“I guess not. I’m assuming your parents don’t know you smoke?”

“No.” Dean glanced over. Castiel was staring straight ahead, one hand tucked into the pocket of his jacket. He looked annoyed.

“Something on your mind?”

“No, and even if there were, I don’t see how it’s any of your concern.”

“Just trying to be friendly.”

“We’re not friends.” Dean blinked. He knew they weren’t friends. Obviously, they  _ couldn’t _ be friends, but that didn’t mean they couldn’t be civil to each other.

“Well…okay then.” He took one more drag on his vape and went back inside. Sam was still talking to Gabriel, but he excused himself when Dean caught his eye.

“Hey, where’d you…” Sam trailed off. “Oh.”

“Having fun?” Sam smiled.

“Yeah, actually. Gabe’s cool. How’d it go with Castiel?”

“He’s a dick.”

“Oh.” Dean scanned the room for Pamela. He spotted her in the corner by one of the couches and went over.

“Do you need me anymore?” Pamela frowned.

“Not until after the rally starts, why?”

“I’m going back to the hotel.”

“Not by yourself, you’re not.” Dean rolled his eyes.

“I’ll be fine. Worry about me after Mom wins.” Pamela grabbed his arm before he could walk away.

“Your mother put me in charge of your safety, Dean Winchester. You are not going anywhere without supervision.” Dean shook his arm free.

“Fine.” He knew better than to argue. He went back into the green room and grabbed his clothes. He ducked into the bathroom and changed, then went back outside. Castiel was still there, staring up at the clouds. Dean stood a few feet away and took a long drag on his vape. He wanted a cigarette. God, he wanted a cigarette, but he knew better than to smoke while he was on the campaign trail. He was watching the smoke float through the air when he heard Castiel snort. He looked over.

“What?”

“Nothing, just,” he gestured to what Dean was wearing. Dean looked down at himself. Jeans, a Led Zeppelin t-shirt, and the flannel that Charlie had deemed his bi shirt.

“What?”

“You really don’t have a problem with people knowing?” Dean furrowed his brow.

“Knowing what? That I’m bi?” Dean exhaled a cloud of smoke. “Why should I care?”

“Image.”

“If a bunch of bigoted assholes wanna condem me for being something I have no control over, that’s on them, not me.”

“And if it costs your mother the election?”

“Fine. I wouldn’t want her running a country that would base its vote on  _ my _ sexuality rather than  _ her _ platform.”

“And you’re sure your mother wouldn’t resent you if she lost because of you?” Dean turned to face Castiel.

“My mother happens to love me for exactly who I am and she signed off on me being open about who I am. She doesn’t want me to hide any part of myself just for appearance sake because I shouldn’t  _ have _ to! It’s 2016 for fucks sake!” Castiel took a step back and Dean realized he’d been getting closer as he was yelling. He took a deep breath and tried to steady his nerves. Now he really,  _ really _ wanted a cigarette. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to yell like that.”

“No, I obviously touched a nerve. I’ll leave you alone.”

“You didn’t touch a nerve, but you shouldn’t assume that everyone’s parents are like yours. If my mother loses this election, the only person she’ll blame is herself, for not reaching enough people. She would never blame me for just…being who I am.” Castiel was silent for a minute. Dean wondered what he was thinking. He looked rattled, but it was probably collateral damage from Dean yelling.

“You’re right, I shouldn’t jump to conclusions. My apologies.” Dean fiddled with his vape.

“Do you have a problem with me?” Castiel actually looked startled.

“No, not at all. I’m utterly indifferent to sexual orientation.” Now it was Dean’s turn to snort.

“Sure.” Castiel titled his head and narrowed his eyes.

“Just because Chuck and Naomi and most of my siblings have misguided notions about certain sexualities doesn’t mean I do. You shouldn’t assume everyone has the same views as their parents just because you do.” Yeah, okay, he deserved that. Dean cracked a smile.

“Point. Sorry.” He held out his hand. “We never got properly introduced. Dean Winchester. Aquarius, mechanic, bi disaster.”

“Castiel Novak. I prefer Cas.”

“Good to meet you, Cas. Guess I’ll be seeing you on the campaign trail.” Dean tucked his vape into his pocket and went back inside.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the chapter where the homophobic comments tag comes in. Basically, Michael is an asshole.

After Dean had gone back inside, Cas had been thinking maybe he wasn’t so bad. Six hours later, after the rallies and thirty minutes into the reception dinner, Cas was back to his original line of thinking. From where he was sitting, he had a clear view of Dean working the room. He was shamelessly flirting with everyone who was willing to talk to him. He had changed back into his suit at some point and the pin was back in its place. Seeing it irritated Cas more than that ridiculous plaid shirt had. He looked at the glass on champagne in front of him. He was allowed to drink during social events and he and Gabriel had discovered that he had an incredibly high tolerance, but he didn’t trust himself around anyone who wasn’t his brother, or his cousin Balthazar.

He picked up the glass and made his way across the room to the dessert table, where Gabriel had pretty much set up camp. Cas wasn’t surprised. Gabriel was a sugar junkie. He stood beside his brother and sipped his champagne.

“You’re gonna be a boring stick in the mud tonight, aren’t you?”

“Don’t I have to be?”

“Come on, man, live a little!”

“Not here. Not now.”

“Are you really that desperate for Mom and Dad to pay for college? You’re twenty-one, Cas. You’re an adult. You’re allowed to drink, so drink.”

“I’m fine, Gabe.” Gabriel rolled his eyes, but he didn’t push the subject. Cas took another sip of his champagne. “You seem to be getting along well with Sam.”

“He’s a cool kid. Smart like you. You’d probably get along with him.” Cas hummed noncommittally, his eyes landing on Dean again. He didn’t want to watch Dean charm most of the room, but he couldn’t seem to pull his eyes away. It hurt, seeing Dean so comfortable with who he was and completely unafraid of what the consequences might be. “Hello, Earth to Cassie. Come in, Cassie.” Cas blinked and realized Gabriel had been talking to him.

“I’m sorry, what were you saying?” Gabriel raised an eyebrow.

“You got a thing for green-eyes over there?”

“No,” Cas said into his glass.

“Oh my, God. You do!”

“No, I don’t.” He didn’t. At the very least he was indifferent to Dean’s presence. At the most he was agitated by it. He took another sip of champagne and started to walk away. He was focused on getting back to his table where he would remain for the rest of the night, and didn’t notice someone crossing into his path until they collided. Cas hit the ground hard, his glass of champagne spilling all over the floor before it shattered. Whoever had run into him landed on top of him.

“Shit.” The weight moved immediately and Cas sat up a little, only to find himself face to face with Dean Winchester. Dean half-smiled. “Uh, hey, Cas. Funny running into you here.” Cas didn’t laugh. He didn’t move. He barely breathed. The room was deadly silent, but no one had made a move to help either of them up. Cas stared while Dean clearly tried to think of something else to say. He noticed a piece of glass caught in Dean’s hair and, on an impulse, he reached up to remove it. That slight movement was apparently all he needed to get Michael and Raphael into action. They both materialized at his sides, helping him up.

“I can manage,” Cas muttered.

“Careful,” Michael said quietly. “You don’t want to catch anything.” Cas almost hauled off and punched his brother right there. Dean had to have heard that, but he didn’t have a chance to look back as he was herded towards the bathrooms.

“Get cleaned up,” Raphael said and he and Michael went back to the reception room. Cas stared at himself in the mirror. His nose was dripping blood intermittently, and there was a thin cut across his chin, where he’d hit it against the tile floor. He had just turned on the water when the door opened.

“I got it, Sammy.” The door closed and Cas made eye contact with Dean in the mirror. He turned around slowly.

“Are you okay?”

“Been better,” Dean said icily. He headed for the sink two down from where Cas was. Cas turned back to the mirror. “You look like shit.”

“Well, aren’t you all charm?”

“I could be, if you wanted me to.” Cas’s head snapped to Dean. He was looking straight ahead, but he had a lazy smirk on his face. In the mirror, his eyes were tinged red.

“Oh. You’re drunk.” Dean turned to look at him.

“So? Doesn’t make my words any less sincere.” He took a small step forward and Cas backed up on instinct. Dean frowned for a moment and then his face went rigid. He turned back to the sink and started wiping his face. “Right. Sorry. Wouldn’t want you to catch anything.” He had heard. Cas sighed.

“Dean, what my brother said in no way reflects my personal feelings.”

“You didn’t say anything,” Dean said.

“I’m sorry?”

“After he said it, you didn’t say anything. You could’ve at least pretended you had a different opinion, but you didn’t say a fucking word.”

“I couldn’t.”

“Why, because god forbid you don’t agree with everything your family says and does?”

“Yes! You think I  _ like _ this? You think I  _ enjoy _ listening to my family make hateful, bigoted comments like that? Well, I don’t, but I have to put up with it because it’s my job. It’s my job to be the perfect son. It’s the part I have to play to ensure I get the future I want. Once I get where I need to be, then I can start to actually make a difference in this world, but I can’t get there without my parents’ money and the only way I’ll continue to have access to that is if I continue playing my part. So don’t stand there and act like I don’t care just because I didn’t speak up.” Cas turned back to the sink and splashed some water on his face. By the time the blood was gone and he was drying off, Dean was still standing there. He didn’t speak until Cas faced him again.

“I’m sorry. You said you’re not like them and I should’ve believed you.”

“You have every right not to. We’re enemies.” Dean smirked.

“Are we? Doesn’t feel like it.”

“Well, what would you call it then?”

“Our parents are political rivals. That has nothing to do with us.” Dean walked closer and this time, Cas stood his ground. Dean got right up in his personal space and reached into his pocket. Before Cas could ask what he was doing, Dean had his phone in his hand. “No password,” he tsked. “Bad move, Cas. Here. Take my number. I think we could be good friends, but if you don’t then you don’t have to use it.” Dean handed Cas his phone back with a smile. “See you around, Cas.” He walked out of the bathroom and Cas stared at his phone. Dean had put his name in as Cosmic Cowboy, complete with the cowboy emoji. Cas smiled a little and put his phone back in his pocket before rejoining the reception.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All right y'all. I totally meant to update this earlier, but for someone who's on vacation from work, I have had a very long day. Anyway, enjoy!

Dean was changing the oil in a beat up old Jeep when he got the first text. He wiped his hands on the rag in his back pocket and fished out his phone. He almost always kept it in his locker, but Sam had said he might be leaving the library early and Dean had made him promise to text. He was assuming it was Sam so he was surprised when he only saw a number.

**8155558105 [3:12pm]:** Hello Dean. This is Cas.

Dean smiled to himself. It had been two weeks since the Pittsburgh rally and he had been wondering if Cas would text him. He hadn’t been holding his breath, but it was a nice surprise. He added the contact to his phone.

**Dean [3:12pm]:** Hey Cas what’s up?

 **Angel** **[3:13pm]:** Sitting in an online lecture. Bored out of my mind. What about you?

 **Dean [3:13pm]:** At work. It’s pretty slow. I’m kinda just waiting for Sammy to text me so I can duck out early.

 **Angel [3:14pm]:** Where’s Sam?

 **Dean [3:14pm]:** Library with his study group. Kid’s always got his nose buried in a book. He’s gonna kick college in the ass next year.

 **Angel [3:14pm]:** What about you? Are you in school?

 **Dean [3:15pm]:** Nope. Not my thing. I work at my uncle’s garage.

 **Angel [3:15pm]:** Yes, you said you were a mechanic. I know nothing about cars, but do you enjoy it?

 **Dean [3:15pm]:** Yeah

 **Angel [3:16pm]:** Then that’s all that matters

 **Dean [3:16pm]:** What’s your major?

 **Angel [3:17pm]:** I’m going for a master’s in government and a bachelor’s in business then on to law school

 **Dean [3:17pm]:** Corporate law like your mom?

 **Angel [3:18pm]:** 🙄 Please. I plan on being a civil rights attorney. But my parents don’t need to know that until after I graduate.

Dean smirked. Cas was more of a rebel than he’d thought. Bobby walked in from the break room. Dean responded quickly then tucked his phone into his pocket.

“You slacking off, Winchester?”

“Never, sir.” Dean put the oil cap back on the Jeep and closed the hood. “Mind if I take my break?” Bobby looked around the empty garage.

“You can go, if you want, kid. Me and Ash can handle it.”

“You’re sure?”

“Yeah, get outta here. Go spend time with your brother.” That wasn’t a bad idea. Dean clocked out, detoured by the front desk to say goodbye to Jo, then got in his car. He spent most of his time on the campaign trail, so whenever he was home, whether it was for a day or several weeks, he drove himself everywhere. Baby needed her exercise, even if Pamela said it was against regulations. Dean wasn’t worried about an assassination attempt. Those only ever happened to sitting Presidents. Not the people running. He started Baby’s engine and drove the four blocks to the library. Normally he would just sit in Baby until Sam came out, but he hadn’t heard from his brother yet. He got out and went inside.

He scanned the computer stations and the tables of people. He spotted Sam with a group of kids. They were talking and laughing quietly and there were stacks of notes between them. He walked over and put his hand on Sam’s shoulder. Sam looked up and frowned slightly.

“Hey, Dean. Did you leave work early?”

“Yeah. It was dead so Bobby let me go. You having fun?” Sam smiled.

“Yeah. These are my friends Jessica, Brady, Luis, Alex, and Rebecca. Guys, this is my brother Dean.”

“Hi.” Jessica spoke first. She smiled. “Sam talks about you all the time.”

“Jess!” Sam snapped and Dean laughed. He ruffled his brother’s hair. “Dean!”

“Aw, come on, Sam,” Rebecca said, laughing. “He’s your older brother. It’s his job to embarrass you.”

“Please don’t give him any ideas.” Dean grinned and Alex caught it.

“Too late.” Sam looked up at Dean with perfect puppy eyes. Dean relented.

“All right, you’re off the hook this time. You guys almost done or should I come back?” Sam looked around the table.

“We’re at a stopping place,” Brady said.

“Same time tomorrow,” Jessica reminded everyone as they got their stuff together. Dean didn’t miss the way Sam looked at her as they all walked out.

“Something you wanna tell me, Sammy?” he asked once they were in Baby.

“What?” Dean raised an eyebrow.

“You gonna sit there and tell me you don’t have a crush on that girl?” Sam’s cheeks turned a light shade of scarlet.

“Shut up.”

“That’s a yes. Ask her out, man.”

“Why? We’re all leaving for college in less than a year. I may never see her again.”

“Yeah, but you might also miss out on something really great.” Dean put Baby in gear and headed for the house. “At least think about it. Promise me that.”

“I promise I’ll think about it.”

“Thank you. You want ice cream or something before we go home?”

“I’m not a kid, Dean.”

“And since when is ice cream only for kids? I’m getting a milkshake. Do you want one or not?” Sam sighed.

“Yes.”

“There’s my little brother. Strawberry, right?”

“Yes. Thank you.” Dean pulled into the Sonic and ordered, then took out his phone. He had one unread message.

**Angel [3:32pm]:** I feel like you would wear this

Attached was a picture of bomber jacket in bi colors. Dean burst out laughing. He couldn’t help it. Sam looked over.

“What?” Dean showed him the screen. “I don’t know who Angel is, but they definitely get you. And they better have a link for you.”

“I’m not buying it, Sam! I’m not ashamed of who I am, but there’s wearing a pin on my lapel and there’s that.”

“Come on, Dean, it’s awesome! And you need a bomber jacket!”

“Why?”

“Because you do.”

“I’ll think about it,” Dean said to get his brother to stop talking. He wasn’t going to buy the jacket. It was cool, but he was fairly certain he wouldn’t be able to pull it off.

**Dean [3:34pm]:** 😂😂😂 Maybe after my mom wins. There’s making a statement and there’s that. It’s a cool jacket though. Sam likes it.

 **Angel [3:34pm]:** So buy it for Sam

Dean started to tell Cas that he couldn’t because Sam wasn’t bi, but…he really didn’t know. He had kind of assumed that if Sam weren’t straight he would’ve told him as soon as he realized. So either he hadn’t realized it yet, or he was straight. Dean looked over at his little brother, who had pulled one of his textbooks out of his backpack. Suddenly, he felt compelled to ask, but he couldn't. That wasn’t fair to Sam. He should be able to come out on his own time, if he needed to at all.

“Dean, you’re thinking too hard,” Sam said without looking up from his book.

“Sorry.” The carhop brought out their milkshakes. Dean thanked him with a smile and a wink. “Here. Quit studying. Have some sugar.” Sam rolled his eyes, but took the milkshake.

“Thanks.”

“Do you wanna do something when we get home? Play a board game or something?” Sam put his book back in his bag and turned on the seat.

“Dean, what is all this?”

“What?”

“The milkshakes after study group. Asking me to play a board game. It’s like you’re trying to…” Sam stopped. Dean pulled into the driveway and cut the engine.

“What?”

“Dean, you know that me going to college isn’t gonna change anything, right?” Dean scoffed.

“Sure, kid. Mom’s gonna get elected, I’m gonna be shuttled off to DC, and you’re gonna be across the country at Stanford. Don’t get me wrong, I’m so damn proud of you, but…it feels like too much is changing at once.”

“Dean, I haven’t even _applied_ to Stanford yet. I might not. It was just a thought I had. Jess and I were talking about it, but she hasn’t mentioned it since that one time.” Sam smiled hesitantly. “You know it doesn’t matter if we’re on opposite sides of the country. You’re still gonna be my big brother. You’re still gonna be my first call if anything happens or if I need advice. You don’t have to try to hang on to the way things were when I was a kid. Things change, that’s what growing up is, but we’ll always be brothers.”

“You know, Sammy, you’re getting pretty smart in your old age,” Dean teased. Sam laughed. “So is that a no on the board game?”

“You know what, it’s been a while, but I bet I can still kick your ass at Monopoly.” Dean grinned.

“Oh, you’re on.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's a link to the jacket Cas sent Dean in case anyone was curious
> 
> https://fashion4lgbt.com/products/mens-bomber-jacket-bisexual


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry, I forgot to update yesterday! Everything was crazy. Please enjoy and Happy Thanksgiving!

“Why do you keep looking at your phone like that?” Gabriel asked, throwing a piece of popcorn at him. Cas looked up. “You keep smiling like a dork every time you pick up your phone. What are you doing?”

“Nothing. Watch your movie, I have a test to study for.”

“Then maybe you should leave your phone with me so you can focus.”

“Gabriel, the only way you will ever get your hands on my phone without my supervision is over my dead body,” Cas said. His phone buzzed in his lap.

**Cosmic Cowboy 🤠[5:18pm]:** What movie is he watching?

**Cas [5:18pm]:** Weekend at Bernie’s

**Cosmic Cowboy 🤠[5:19pm]:** Ah a classic. And you’re doing what?

**Cas [5:19pm]:** Talking to you instead of studying. Gabe’s getting suspicious.

**Cosmic Cowboy 🤠[5:20pm]:** 😬 Shit sorry. I’ll leave you alone. You need to study. Text me back when you’re done.

Cas smiled at his phone. He knew Dean was serious. Maybe school wasn’t his thing, but he took studying very seriously. More often than not he was waiting for Sam to get done with his study group when they talked. They hadn’t actually seen each other since Pittsburgh and Cas was finding himself looking out for new tabloid pictures just so he could see Dean again. He…missed him. It was weird. They hadn’t spent nearly enough together for Cas to miss him. And most of the time they’d spent together had been hostile. Cas had no reason to miss Dean, and yet…he did.

“Okay, well you’re not looking at your phone, but you’re definitely not studying either.” Gabriel kicked at Cas’s laptop with his foot. “What’s gotten into you lately?”

“Nothing.”

“Is that the problem?”

“Gabriel!”

“What!? Sometimes that’s the problem! Do you just need to get laid?”

“No! Jesus, Gabe. I’ve got a lot on my mind right now. Between college and the election and deciding where I want to go to law school, it’s a lot.”

“Have you narrowed it down at all?”

“I think either Harvard, NYU, or Stanford.”

“Well, you know where Mom and Dad will want you to go.”

“Harvard. But I don’t think I wanna go there. I don’t really think I wanna go to NYU either. I’m tired of cold weather. California sounds nice and warm.”

“It’s also a very liberal state.”

“So are New York and Massachusetts.”

“Weed isn’t fully legal in New York and Harvard is a prestigious school,” Gabriel pointed out and Cas rolled his eyes.

“I don’t think Chuck and Naomi are worried about me becoming a drug addict. They’re going to want me close to DC if Chuck wins.”

“Point,” Gabriel conceded. “So what are you gonna do?”

“Think about it. That’s all I  _ can _ do right now. I’ll let you know if I make a decision. Are you done watching your stupid movie?”

“ _ Weekend at Bernie’s _ is  _ not _ stupid. It’s hilarious.”

“It’s idiotic. Are you done?”

“Yes, why?” Cas held out his notecards.

“Quiz me.” Gabriel sighed.

“Don’t you have friends who can do this?” Cas dropped his eyes to the bedspread. The truth was, he really didn’t. He’d spent so much of his life sheltered and he had been so afraid to step one foot out of line that the only friends he really had were Gabriel, Anna, Hannah, Balthazar, and a girl named Meg from one of his freshman classes.

“You’re right.” He tucked his flashcards back into his messenger bag. “Sorry for bothering you.”

“Oh, no, don’t do that.” Gabriel grabbed his arm before he could get off the bed. “Come on, I was just teasing. You’re not bothering me. I’ll help you study.”

“You don’t have to, Gabe, it’s okay.”

“I want to. You’re gonna be the greatest civil rights attorney in history. Let me help.”

“Yeah?” Gabriel smiled.

“Yeah.”

*** *** ***

“My brain hurts!” Cas laughed.

“Okay, okay, we can stop.” He gathered up his flashcards and shoved everything into his bag. Two hours was more than enough studying time. He got off Gabriel’s bed and raided the little fridge in the corner. He found a piece of cherry pie. “Can I have this?”

“Why do you ask? I don’t care.”

“Habit,” Cas said, leaning back against the headboard. He took his phone out of his pocket and snapped a picture.

**Cas [8:04pm]:** My reward from Gabe for putting my phone down and actually studying

**Cosmic Cowboy 🤠[8:04pm]:** I WANT THAT!!! That’s not fair!! I love pie!

**Cas [8:05pm]:** Good to know. What have you been doing?

**Cosmic Cowboy 🤠[8:05pm]:** Monopoly battle with Sammy. We’ve been playing for three weeks.

**Cas [8:05pm]:** Sounds like fun. I’ve never played

**Cosmic Cowboy 🤠[8:06pm]:** You know I wanna be mad but I’m not even surprised. Maybe I’ll bring it with me the next time we’re gonna be in the same city.

**Cas [8:06pm]:** Sounds good

**Cosmic Cowboy 🤠[8:06pm]:** Awesome

“You’re doing that stupid smile again.”

“Shut up.” Cas knew he was smiling like an idiot. He didn’t care. He liked Dean. He hadn’t thought he would, but he did.

“Who the hell are you texting?”

“A friend.”

“Can I get a name?”

“No.”

“Why not?” Cas shrugged.

“It’s none of your business.”

“Cassie, do you have a secret boyfriend?” Cas almost dropped his phone at that.

“What? No. I just made some friends at school that you don’t know and you don’t need to know their names.”

“Why, Cas, if I didn’t know any better, I’d say you’re embarrassed by me.”

“Am I that obvious?”

“Cas!” Gabriel smacked his leg and he laughed.

“What? You can mess with me, but I can’t mess with you?” Cas took a bite of his pie. “Movie time?”

“Yes, please! I used too many brain cells helping you study.” Cas laughed.

“You’re an idiot.” He passed Gabriel the remote. “Here, pick something.” He finished his pie, then picked up his phone and texted Dean.

**Cas [8:22pm]:** Gabe just told me he used too many brain cells helping me study 😂😂😂

**Cosmic Cowboy 🤠[8:22pm]:** Sounds like me after I help Sam 😂 He’s studying for the SATs. I never took them and man I’m glad I didn’t. Sometimes I really think I can feel my brain melting.

**Cas [8:23pm]:** Come on Dean you’re smart

**Cosmic Cowboy 🤠[8:23pm]:** Never said I wasn’t. I’m pop culture smart and car smart. Sam’s book smart. Kind of a lethal combination for trivia games.

**Cas [8:24pm]:** You think so? Gabe and I are like that. Maybe we should all play trivial pursuit the next we’re all in the same room.

**Cosmic Cowboy 🤠[8:24pm]:** That could be fun

“You’re doing it again,” Gabriel muttered as he flipped through his Netflix list.

“Am I not allowed to have friends that make me happy?”

“Of course you are, but I don’t get why I can’t know who they are.”

“I’ll tell you when I’m ready,” Cas said. Really, he didn’t care if Gabriel knew he was friends with Dean. Hell, Gabriel would probably end up good friends with Sam if they got to spend more time together. The thing was, he wasn’t entirely sure if he and Dean  _ were _ friends. They were  _ friendly _ , but that didn’t mean friends. He would have to talk to Dean in person, but he didn’t know when he’d get the chance again.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All right, y'all. This is the only day I have off from work for what feels like forever and I feel like death. Your comments always make me happy, so here's an extra chapter this week. Love you guys!

Dean’s thumbs hovered over the keyboard on his phone. He wanted to extend the invitation, but it felt…weird. He looked over at this laptop again. The email from his mother about an upcoming Habitat for Humanity project. Ever since he could remember, he would volunteer for those projects. Once he was out of high school, his mother would let him know whenever one came up and he would take time off work to go. He knew his mother appreciated the good press his presence generated, but that was really just an added bonus. Dean liked helping people and he took every opportunity he could to do just that. He wondered if Cas would be the same way, if given the opportunity.

**Dean [10:16pm]:** Hey. Habitat for humanity project in Oregon this weekend. You wanna come?

**Angel [10:17pm]:** If I can get Chuck and Naomi to agree to it sure. It would be nice to see you again.

Dean smiled, thankful he wasn’t the only one thinking it. He was even more thankful that Cas had said it first. Dean was open, bold, and unashamed of who he was. Cas was…very much the opposite. Their friendship was shaky at best and Dean was worried about coming off too intense. Normally, he wouldn’t care, but something about Cas intrigued him. There was something there. On the surface, he was a perfect little wind-up toy, but underneath…he had a wild streak. Dean just needed to figure out how to get to it.

**Dean [10:18pm]:** You too. If nothing else just tell them it’ll be good press.

**Angel [10:18pm]:** That is actually not a bad idea. Lord knows Chuck needs all the good press he can get. Might distract the country from the impending tax audit.

**Dean [10:19pm]:** Yeah my mom’s got one of those coming up too. Like we would cheat on our taxes. Do people really think we have nothing better to do?

**Angel [10:19pm]:** Apparently. What are you doing right now?

**Dean [10:20pm]:** Laying in bed scrolling through my email. Might watch something on Netflix. You?

**Angel [10:20pm]:** Getting drunk with Gabe and watching are you smarter than a fifth grader. Spoiler alert: Gabe is not smarter than a fifth grader, drunk or sober.

**Dean [10:21pm]:** So you’re not a boring stick in the mud all the time! Good to know

**Angel [10:21pm]:** Dean

**Angel [10:21pm]:** Shut up

**Dean [10:22pm]:** 😂😂😂 Come on I’m messing with you man. You’ll let me know about Oregon?

**Angel [10:22pm]:** I’ll bring it up tomorrow. “Good press” should get them to say yes. I’ll let you know by tomorrow night. Goodnight Dean.

**Dean [10:23pm]:** Night Cas

*** *** ***

“Why can’t I come?” Sam was whining. Actually whining, like he was five years old again. Dean hated that a small, nostalgic part of him found it a little endearing.

“Because you have a test to study for. I’ll be back Sunday night. We can have a movie night or a game night or something.” Sam rolled his eyes.

“Don’t patronize me, Dean. I can take a weekend and help out. Jess can take notes for me in class tomorrow. Please?” Sam fixed him with his famous puppy eyes and Dean caved. He always caved.

“Fine, go ask Mom.” Sam ran deeper into the house. Dean stepped out onto the porch and lit a cigarette. He took out his phone and checked his unread messages.

**Angel [3:34pm]:** Gabe’s coming with me. Apparently I’m not allowed to have fun without him.

**Dean [4:16pm]:** That’s cool. Sam just begged me to take him with me so if mom says yes then he’ll be tagging along.

**Angel [4:17pm]:** Good. Gabe will have someone other than me to annoy.

**Dean [4:17pm]:** Pretty sure little brothers are the annoying ones. Older brothers are the cool ones.

**Angel [4:18pm]:** Whatever you need to tell yourself Dean

Dean rolled his eyes, but he couldn’t help chuckling. Cas had a dry sense of humor that he really liked. Sam came out onto the porch with a suitcase. He stopped two steps from the doorway.

“Why? Why do you have to do that?” Dean took a drag from his cigarette.

“Because I’m the rebel kid who barely finished high school and you’re the golden boy. Go pack the trunk, I’ll be over in a minute.”

“Don’t we have a staff for this?” Sam muttered and Dean smacked him lightly on the back of the head.

“You’re a Winchester, Sam. Winchesters pull their weight, even if we do have a staff. Go.” Sam rolled his suitcase down to the waiting car. Benny was sitting in the driver’s seat. Charlie was riding shotgun for added security, as if they needed it. Pamela was waiting in the back. She always had mixed feelings about his charity work. It made for good press and he was doing something  _ good _ , but the security risk always made her nervous. Dean flicked his cigarette butt into the coffee can and walked to the car. He was halfway up the driveway when something occurred to him. He turned back and ran into the house. He dug around in one of the cabinets at the bottom of the bookshelves in the living room until he found what he was looking for. He jogged back outside, made sure the door was locked, then went to the car. He opened the trunk and put the box in with his luggage. The door opened and Pamela glared at him.

“You better not let the press catch you doing that.”

“Pamela, sweetheart, I’m not as stupid as I look.”

“Don’t call me sweetheart.” Dean flashed her a grin as Benny pulled onto the main road. The drive to the airport was quick. Dean walked through the procedures and tried to ignore the bubble of anxiety forming in the pit of his stomach. He absolutely hated flying. He had to do it a lot now that he was acting as a surrogate for his mother’s campaign, but he still white-knuckled it through every single flight. By the time they were all seated, he was humming Metallica under his breath and trying to act like he wasn’t scared for his life. On his right, Sam was staring happily out the window, waiting for the plane to take off. To his left, Pamela looked like she was trying not to reprimand him for fidgeting.

“Dean, calm down,” she said as the pilot started going over the instructions. “You’ve done this hundreds of times. You’ll be fine.” Dean nodded, but he couldn’t make his voice work and he had the armrests in a death grip. As the plane started its ascent, he squeezed his eyes shut. He was counting his breaths and reminding himself to keep inhaling when he felt a hand on his right arm. He opened his eyes. Sam was smiling a little.

“It’s gonna be okay.” Dean actually managed a weak laugh.

“I’m supposed to be saying that to you.” Sam shrugged.

“Yeah, well, you’re not Superman. Everyone’s afraid of something. Just breathe through it. It’ll be over before you know it.” Dean nodded and closed his eyes again. He tilted his head back against the headrest and tried to focus on the steady rhythm of Sam’s hand on his arm.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 3am update because I can't sleep and I have to be at work in like 6 hours and I definitely won't remember later. Enjoy!

“Remind me again why we’re doing this?” Cas rested his aviators on top of his head and squinted at his brother.

“ _ I’m _ doing this because I want to help people.  _ You _ are under no obligation to be here.”

“But we’ve never done anything like this before. Why start now?”

“I was invited by a friend,” Cas said, already walking away so Gabriel couldn’t ask him any further questions. He might not have been as smart as a fifth-grader, but as soon as he saw Dean, he’d make the connection. Cas only hoped Sam would be a good enough distraction so that Gabriel wouldn’t interrogate him until later.

The site was already milling with people, which was a good thing. Easier to blend in, at least for the time being. As soon as Cas had mentioned good press, Naomi had called all the local reports. He only saw a couple at the moment, but it was early. There would be a swarm by lunch, he was sure. Cas did a quick scan, but he didn’t see Dean or Sam. Maybe they weren’t there yet. Dean didn’t strike Cas as the early to bed early to rise type. Gabriel had finally caught up with him and had just opened his mouth to say something when someone yelled,

“Hey, Novak!” Both Cas and Gabriel turned. Cas smiled when he saw Dean on the other side of the barricade. He walked over with Gabriel trailing after him for lack of anything else to do.

“Hello, Dean.”

“You’re wearing jeans.” Dean seemed surprised.

“Yes, I am. Were you expecting me to show up in a suit and tie?”

“Yeah, kinda. I mean, I’ve never seen you wear anything else. Any of you. Although, I see you’re still sticking with that ridiculous coat.”

“And I see you’re still sticking with making a statement,” Cas countered, nodding at the flannel Dean was wearing, which wasn’t the same as the one he’d had on the last time they’d seen each other, but just as brightly colored. Dean opened his mouth to retort when someone behind him said,

“Dean, if I knew you were gonna stand around all day talking I wouldn’t’ve come with you.” Dean rolled his eyes and turned to face his younger brother.

“Why don’t you go paint a wall or something?” Sam fixed him with a cold stare before he caught Cas’s eye.

“Oh. Hey, Cas. Hey, Gabe. You guys here to help?”

“That’s what I’m told,” Gabriel said and Cas could feel his eyes burning a hole in the side of his head. He would deal with it later. Dean smiled.

“Go get checked in and we can have a conversation without a literal fucking wall between us.” Cas and Gabriel went over to the sign-in table and got set up. Gabriel didn’t say a word, but Cas could feel the questions. He ignored them as they made their way over to where Dean and Sam had been standing.

“So, where do we start?”

“Well, the very nice man with the hardhat over there,” Dean gestured with his chin, “put me in charge of painting.” He held up a paintbrush and grinned. “So we paint.”

*** *** ***

“Do you do this often?” Cas asked. He and Dean had been working side by side in companionable silence for about an hour. Sam and Gabriel had broken off almost immediately and launched into a discussion about something that Cas was pretty sure he had never heard of. He was happy, though, that Gabriel was spending his time with Sam rather than pestering him.

“All the time, since I was in high school. I used to only do it over the summer, but after I graduated, my mom started emailing me every time one came up. Bobby’s cool about me taking a weekend off every once in a while to help people out.”

“What about Sam?”

“He comes sometimes. When he doesn’t have school. Or when he can convince our mom that it’s okay for him to miss a day.”

“I’m guessing that doesn’t happen often?”

“It happens more than it should.” Dean paused to look over at Sam. “He’s a good kid and I get that he wants to help and make a difference in the world, but he needs to stay focused. He’s got the SATs coming up soon and needs to do well if he wants to get into Stanford.”

“Is that his first choice?”

“I don’t know. He only brought it up once, but he seemed excited. And there’s a girl he’s friends with that might be applying. I think he might go if she does. Although, he did say if Mom wins he might pick a school closer to DC.”

“This girl. Does he like her?” Dean chuckled.

“Yeah, but he won’t do anything about it since they’re both gonna be leaving for college.”

“Do you think he’ll really choose his school based on her?”

“I think she might be  _ one _ of the major factors. The results of the election will be another.”

“We won’t know those until after the first semester starts.”

“I know. He might make a decision and then transfer, depending on how things go. I haven’t really talked to him about it.”

“Why not? It seems like an important thing to discuss.” Dean was quiet for a beat too long and Cas looked at him. He looked…sad. He had the same look on his face that Gabriel had had when Cas told him he was going to law school in a different state. “You don’t want him to leave.” Dean shrugged a little.

“No. It’s selfish as hell, I know that, but he’s my little brother. And with everything else that’s happening, it feels like it’s just another thing that’s changing.”

“It’s not selfish to want your family to be together,” Cas said. “You should talk to Sam.”

“I did, but knowing how I feel isn’t gonna change his decision, and I wouldn’t want it to. It’s his life, he can do what he wants.” Dean started painting again. Cas didn’t say anything else. He wanted to. He wanted to say something to make Dean feel better, but there was nothing. This wasn’t a shared life experience for him. His family was always together and he really couldn’t wait to get away from them. They were quiet for another hour or so, but Cas didn’t mind. He found that he just liked being in Dean’s presence. He was a bold, brash person, but his energy was warm and calming.

“Were your parents really okay with you dressing like that?” Dean asked, catching Cas off guard.

“I don’t think they were okay with me dressing in “street clothes” so much as they were okay with me  _ not _ potentially ruining a very nice, very expensive suit.” Dean was smirking and Cas frowned. “What?”

“You use air quotes.”

“And?”

“I just think it’s kinda cute, that’s all.” Cas felt something hot flash up the back of his neck. He cleared his throat and went back to painting. “Sorry, I shouldn’t’ve said that. I know you’re indifferent to sexual orientation or whatever, but you probably still don’t want guys flirting with you. It’s just a reflex for me. I’ll watch it around you.” Cas turned back to Dean, anger sparking beneath his skin.

“Don’t make assumptions about me, Dean. If I were uncomfortable, I would’ve told you. I told you I’m not like my family, so don’t draw your own conclusions about me based on my family.” Cas turned back to the wall. After a long moment, Dean said,

“You’re right. I’m sorry, Cas.”


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1:30am update because I can't sleep. Thank you to the people leaving me lovely comments. You guys always make my day better! Hope you all enjoy!

“You did what?” Sam asked as they got off the elevator.

“I invited Cas and Gabe up here to play Trivial Pursuit with us. Us against them.”

“Why?” Dean shoved the key card into the slot and opened the door to their hotel room.

“Cas said he thought it might be fun.”

“Did you clear this with Pamela?”

“Clear what with me?” Pamela asked from the couch. Dean sighed. This wasn’t going to go over well.

“Okay, don’t be mad--.”

“Not a good way to start, Winchester.”

“I invited Gabriel and Castiel Novak over to play Trivial Pursuit with me and Sam.” Pamela blinked at him.

“I…don’t even know which part of that sentence to focus on first. Trivial Pursuit?”

“Me and Sam are unbeatable. Castiel said he and Gabriel are unbeatable. Felt like a challenge so…” Dean shrugged. He was stretching the truth just a little, but it hardly mattered.

“And you just…invited them here. You do know they’re literally on the opposite side, right? They could be using this as an opportunity to try to get information out of you.”

“Or they’re just people who like trivia games,” Dean said. “Look, I get it, but just because Charles Novak is the scourge of mankind doesn’t mean I can’t be nice to his kids. They really don’t seem that bad. I mean, they’re here to help people just like me and Sam.”

“They’re probably just here for the free publicity.”

“Like that’s not the only reason you actually approve these trips,” Dean snapped. “You can sit here the whole time if you want, but I’m not budging on this. I’m going to treat them with respect until they give me a reason not to.” Pamela sighed.

“You’re a nightmare, Dean Winchester. I will be sitting here the _entire_ time. And if I think even for a _second_ that you might reveal something about your mother’s campaign, I _will_ call it.”

“Fine.” He knew that was the best he was going to get and, really, he didn’t care. He just wanted to spend time with Cas. And he got the feeling that Sam wanted to spend more time with Gabriel. He was a little uneasy about that. He didn’t think Gabriel was a bad person, but he was twenty-five and Sam was seventeen. It was an age gap that made Dean uncomfortable, even for friends. But he wasn’t going to tell Sam who he was allowed to socialize with. He would just have to keep an eye on him. Dean got up and went into the adjoining room. Sam was sitting on one of the beds, flipping through an SAT prep book.

“How’d that go?”

“Better than I thought it would.” Dean flopped onto the other bed and looked at his brother.

“Want me to quiz you until they get here?”

“You don’t have to. I’m just skimming.” Sam looked up. “Oh, and I forgot to tell you, we’re moving our study group to weekends at Brady’s house. Becca thought marathon studying might help.”

“Don’t burn yourself out, Sam.”

“I won’t. I know my limits.”

“Good.” Sam went back to his book. Dean realized he was being a little overbearing, but he couldn’t help it. He had pretty much raised him and he was worried that Sam was going to stress himself out and have one of those teenage overachiever meltdowns. But he needed to take a step back and trust that Sam could take care of himself.

He forgot that sometimes. Sam _wasn’t_ a kid anymore. He was going to college in the fall. Dean wouldn’t be there to make sure he was doing his homework and getting enough sleep and remembering to eat. Sam was going to have to do things on his own. Dean smiled to himself a little as he watched Sam run a highlighter over a few sentences. He was going to be just fine. A knock came at the door. Dean got up and opened it.

“Hey, Deano!”

“Hey, Gabe. Don’t call me that.”

“It’s too late,” Cas said. “He already gave you a stupid nickname. You’re stuck with it.”

“Cassie’s right,” Gabriel said with a grin. He shouldered past Dean and into the room. Dean raised an eyebrow at Cas.

“Cassie?”

“Please don’t. I hate him so much for that.” Dean chuckled.

“Yeah, I’d hate him, too. You gonna come in or do I have to invite you?” “I’m not a vampire,” Cas said. He stepped inside and Dean shut the door.

“Word of warning,” he said once they were all in the same room, “our mom’s lovely Chief of Staff Pamela will be keeping an eye on us. Or, well, me mostly, I guess, but you get the point.”

“You ramble,” Gabriel noted. “Good to know. So are we playing or what?” Dean opened his suitcase and took out the box.

“All right, me and Sam against you guys.”

“What are we playing for?” Cas asked. Huh. Dean hadn’t thought about that.

“How about losing team buys drinks at a bar tomorrow night?” Gabriel said.

“Hi,” Sam said. “I’m seventeen.”

“Drinks don’t have to be alcoholic,” Dean pointed out. “Losers buy drinks. We could have dinner in the restaurant downstairs tomorrow night.”

“Sounds good,” Cas said. Gabriel and Sam nodded their agreement so Dean took the board out of the box and unfolded it. Sam reached over and started shuffling the cards.

“Color preference?” Dean asked.

“Blue,” Cas said and Gabriel rolled his eyes. Sam stopped shuffling.

“He does that, too?”

“Take the piece that matches his eyes? Yeah.” Sam turned accusing eyes at Dean, who only shrugged.

“See, and you thought it was weird.”

“It is weird,” Sam and Gabriel said in unison. Dean looked over at Cas.

“Guess we’re weird.” Cas smiled.

“I guess so.” Sam finished shuffling while Dean handed out pieces.

“How many games are we playing?”

“Best two out of three?” No one argued so Dean handed the die to Cas.

*** *** ***

“I’d accuse you of cheating, but I can’t figure out how,” Gabriel said. Dean grinned.

“We’re just that good.”

“And we can admit when we’re beat,” Cas said. “But there will be a rematch someday and we will destroy you.”

“I’m holding you to that, Novak.” Dean locked eyes with Cas. Cas narrowed his eyes in a challenge. Dean smirked a little. He was starting to like Cas just a little. He knew he couldn’t act on it, but that didn’t mean it wasn’t there. Sam cleared his throat.

“So, we’ll see you guys tomorrow?”

“Definitely,” Gabriel said, tugging Cas’s arm. “Come on, Cas.” Dean broke eye contact first and followed them to the door while Sam started putting the game away. “I’ll get us a cab.” Cas nodded and Gabriel disappeared down the hall. Cas turned back to Dean and smiled.

“I had fun. Thank you.”

“I did, too. And it seems like Gabe and Sam hit it off.”

“Yes, it would seem so. I’ll see you tomorrow, Dean.”

“Goodnight, Cas.” Dean closed the door and went back into the room. Sam was sitting on his bed, clicking through the TV.

“I like them,” he said. Dean laid on his bed and folded his arms under his head, staring up at the ceiling.

“Yeah, me, too.”


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey y'all, I'm gonna start updating this twice a week! Wednesdays and Sundays. I'm updating early because I just got home from work and I'm about to pass out. I will also probably sleep through most of tomorrow. Enjoy!

Dean Winchester was trouble. Cas had always known that on some level. He was charismatic and completely comfortable with himself. He was exactly the kind of person who was easy to fall for and hard to forget. Cas knew all that. Everyone knew that. But that wasn’t the worst of it. Dean was also smart, funny, and kind. He did things for other people simply because he wanted to. He cared about his family and he supported his brother even if he didn’t want to. So, yeah, Dean Winchester was trouble.

Cas spent the entire day focusing on the walls in front of him. Sam and Gabriel were on the other side of the room, talking and laughing like they had been friends for years. Next to him, Dean was quietly humming a Led Zeppelin song while he worked. Cas could feel Dean’s eyes on him every once in a while, but he refused to look because he didn’t want to get lost in an endless sea of green. When they broke for lunch, Cas found his brother and apologized to Sam before dragging Gabriel away.

“Ow. What?”

“I’m going to need you to keep Dean away from me.”

“Why?”

“Just…” Cas didn’t want to explain. “Just, please.”

“We were all getting along just fine last night.” Gabriel’s face darkened a little. “What did he do to you?” Cas rolled his eyes.

“Nothing, relax. I just…can’t be around him right now. So distract him for the rest of the day. Please.” Gabriel glanced over Cas’s shoulder at Sam.

“Fine.”

“Thank you.” They walked back over. Dean had joined his brother.

“Family meeting?” he asked.

“Something like that,” Cas said.

Lunch was filled with jokes and small talk, but Cas wasn’t really paying attention. He spent most of the time finding every way possible to avoid looking at Dean without being obvious about it. Gabriel nudged him a few times, but no one said anything. After lunch, Gabriel said,

“All right, Deano, you’re with me.” Sam looked at Gabriel. Dean looked at Cas. “Come on, I’ve been talking Sam’s ear for almost two days and I’m sure you’re bored with Cas. Let’s switch!” Sam and Dean traded a look and both shrugged.

“Sure, what the hell.” Gabriel pulled Dean across the room. Sam looked at Cas.

“Well, that was odd.”

“That’s Gabe,” Cas said, picking up his paintbrush.

“Yeah. Hope I didn’t piss him off.”

“What?”

“I’m just trying to figure out why he all of a sudden wants to spend time with Dean. I thought we were getting along.” Sam shook his head, dog-like, then smiled. “Oh well. Guess we could stand to get to know each other. Gabe told me you’re going to law school next year.”

“I am. I just haven’t picked a school.”

“Off the top of my head, I would say Harvard or NYU. Stanford has a good law program, too.” Cas smiled.

“Those are my top three picks. I’ve been leaning towards Stanford. I like the idea of warm weather.”

“I think it would be nice to live near the ocean,” Sam said, “but I know Dean doesn’t want me to move too far from home, so I’ll probably start at KU and transfer to somewhere like GW if Mom wins.” Cas recalled the conversation he had had with Dean yesterday. Sam really was changing his mind about school because of how Dean felt.

“Sam, if you want to go to Stanford, you should go. Dean only wants you to be happy. It might be weird for him at first, but doing what _you_ want will make you both happier in the long run.”

“You think?”

“Definitely. Pick the school that you think will make you the most successful, depending on what you want to do.”

“I haven’t completely decided, but…I think I’d like to be a lawyer.” That caught Cas’s attention.

“What kind? Corporate? Criminal?”

“I don’t know yet. What about you?”

“I plan on being a civil rights attorney. There are too many injustices in this country. Someone needs to fight for the people who don’t have the means to fight for themselves.” Sam looked at him. “The system is broken. It’s not even a system anymore. The rich get richer and the poor keep dying. That’s not a system, it’s a genocide. Our elected officials aren’t doing anything about it, so someone has to.”

“You think you can make a difference?”

“I think if more people banded together we could all make a difference. But someone has to be the first one to draw a line in the sand.”

“You should give speeches,” Sam said after a moment. Cas tilted his head.

“What?”

“You should give speeches. For your dad. Dean does it for our mom sometimes even though I know he doesn’t want to. You should do it. You’d be good at it.”

“Thank you, Sam, but…I can’t give speeches on things I don’t agree with.”

“You don’t agree with your dad’s positions?”

“Not at all. No person in their right mind would.” Sam smirked.

“Gabe said something to that effect yesterday. Why do you both stay if you’re so different from the rest of your family?”

“I’m staying because I need them to pay for school. They’re happy I’m becoming a lawyer. They don’t need to know the specifics until after I graduate. I think Gabriel stays because I’m still there. He wants to look out for me.”

“Older brothers are like that. It can be overbearing, huh?”

“Incredibly. But their hearts are in the right place and I think that’s all that matters.” Sam looked over at their brothers.

“I’m worried about Dean. I know he doesn’t want our mom to win. He’s never said it out loud, but I can feel it. He doesn’t want things to change. And with me leaving for college, it’s too much too fast. He raised me. Our mom was in congress by the time I was four. She was gone a lot. She left us with a nanny, but…Dean took care of me. And now he feels like I’m abandoning him and I don’t know how to help him.”

“Just let him come to terms with it. I just met both of you, but Dean strikes me as the kind of person who gets his happiness from other peoples’ happiness and he seems to really care about you. I think as long as you’re happy, he’ll be able to deal with everything else in his own time.” Sam smiled.

“Thanks, Cas.” Cas smiled back.

“You’re welcome, Sam. So you and Gabe are getting along?”

“Cas, your brother is awesome. He and Dean have the same base personality, but he’s so much different. He’s fun to talk to. I’m glad Dean brought me this weekend. I needed a break from studying and this way at least I’m still doing something. Plus, it looks better to the press if both of us are out here.”

“Surely it’s understandable that you’re in high school.”

“Yeah, but I still like to come out once in a while. I like helping people.”

“So do I. And I told Chuck and Naomi that it would be good publicity. They didn’t need any further convincing. Gabriel tagged along because he doesn’t like me going places alone and he didn’t want me to have fun without him.”

“Don’t you travel with security?” Cas shook his head.

“No, once we all turned eighteen we were given the right to refuse protection. Gabe and I are the only ones who travel without supervision.”

“And you feel safe?”

“I don’t feel unsafe. At least, not any more unsafe than the average American.” A camera click caught Cas’s attention. He and Sam turned towards the sound and saw Dean and Gabriel posing for pictures. Sam laughed.

“We’d better go over there before they do something stupid.”


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, I swear I meant to post this before I went to work this morning, but I kept getting distracted (ADHD and not sleeping for 2 days do NOT mix). Sorry for the unusually late update, but I hope you all enjoy it!

Dean slid his glass closer to the edge of the table, out of Sam’s reach. 

“Come on, Dean, let me try it.” 

“You are a minor and I have two witnesses that could use “Dean Winchester gets underaged brother drunk” against us.” 

“My lips are sealed,” Gabriel said and mimed zipping his lips shut. 

“I’m not in any position to tell someone not to drink underage,” Cas  said and Dean raised an eyebrow. 

“So you do have some rebel in you.” 

“More than a little,” Gabriel  said and Cas elb owed him. Dean laughed. 

“Well, good to know you’re not always a stick in the mud.” He reached for his glass, but before he could take a sip, Sam grabbed it from him. “Hey!” 

“Shut up, Dean. One drink won’t kill me.” Dean shook his head and picked up Sam’s iced tea. He couldn’t be mad. It wasn’t like he hadn’t given his brother a drink before. He just wasn’t sure how he felt about doing it in front of two people who they really weren’t supposed to be friends with. It wasn’t that he didn’t trust Gabriel and  Cas, he just didn’t trust them completely. 

Charles Novak was still a political rival. Dean had to be careful. 

“Jeez, Dean, un c lench. Here.” Sam slid the glass back over. 

“It’s fine, kid. You’ve been stressing yourself out with studying. Live a little.” 

“I think I’ve been stressing  _ you _ out with studying. And stop calling me kid!” Cas laughed. “He won’t. I’m twenty-one and Gabe still calls me “kid” sometimes.”

“It’s an older brother thing,” Gabriel said. 

“It doesn’t matter how old you get, you’ll alway s be kids to us.” Sam and Cas both rolled their eyes. Dean traded a smirk with Gabriel. 

“And on that note, I’m getting drunk,” Cas said. 

“We better go up to the room then,” Gabriel said. “I’m not carrying you.” 

“Way to make me sound like a lightweight.”

“I agree with Gabriel. You might not be a lightweight, but Sammy is.” 

“Dean!” 

“What, it’s true. Come on.” It had taken some convincing and a little lying and a lot of begging, but Dean had gotten Pamela to agree to let them hang out at Cas and Gabriel’ s hotel. With the promise that they would be back by midnight, of course. Because apparently, they were Disney princesses. But Dean hadn’t argued because he was finally out without security and it felt freeing. Once they were upstairs, Gabriel opened his ba g and pulled out a bottle of whiskey. 

“Shots!” 

“Sam, you are doing one,” Dean said immediately. Sam fixed him with bitchface #18. 

“Fine. Who’s first?” 

“I’ll go,” Dean said. Gabriel lined up four shot glasses and filled them. Dean knocked them back  and grinned. He was a little lightheaded, but he shook it off. “All right, who’s next?” Sam  went next. Then Cas. He took five and looked at Gabriel. He poured five more and Cas knocked those back, too. 

“I think I’m starting to feel something.” Dean stared at him. Sam let out a low whistle. 

“I think you’ve met your match, Dean.” He wasn’t wrong. Dean had never met a single person who could drink him under the table, but he was pretty sure Cas could. And  _ of _ _ course, _ the buzzed part of his brain thought  _ that _ was incredibly hot. He took the shot Gabriel passed to him and tried to drown the thought. Cas was attractive, that wasn’t up for debate, but Dean knew better. Just because the guy wasn’t a bigot didn’t mean he wanted Dean to flirt with him. There were so me lines that just shouldn’t be crossed and that was one of them. Playful banter was one thing, but he wasn’t going to ruin a friendship by doing something stupid. 

He watched Cas take another shot. He watched the way his Adam’s apple bobbed when he swallo wed. He watched the way his thumb swiped over his lower lip to catch the few drops that slipped out. He watched Cas’s tongue dart out of his mouth to lick his lips. Dean swallowed hard, his mouth suddenly very dry. Okay, so maybe he would risk ruining thei r friendship. He stood up. 

“I’m going outside.” 

“I’ll join you,” Cas said, standing, too. They went downstairs and walked out of the hotel. 

Once they were on the street, they ducked into an alley where they wouldn’t be seen. 

“I hate that I have to hide this,” Dean muttered as he flicked his lighter. 

“At least you get to do it at home. I can’t smoke anywhere ever. Naomi almost caught me with my vape once and that was terrifying enough.” 

“How’d you get outta that one?” 

“I told her I had been chewing cherry-flavored gum. She gave me a lecture on why I shouldn’t chew gum, but…it could’ve been worse.” 

“You’re not allowed to chew gum?” Cas breathed out a long stream of smoke. 

“There’s a lot I’m allowed to do. But it’s only until I graduate law school. The n I can be whoever I want.” 

“That’s fucking bullshit. Your parents are supposed to love you no matter what. Bad habits included.” Cas laughed. 

“Yes, well, I don’t think Chuck and Naomi are really fit to be parents. I honestly think they just had kids bec ause that’s what the Bible says you’re supposed to do. We’re just objects. Things for them to show off. Which means we have to be perfect.” Dean rolled his eyes. 

“That’s stupid.” 

“Agreed.” Dean watched Cas breathe out more smoke. Something had been  bothering him since yesterday, but he hadn’t found the right moment to ask his question. 

“Cas, can I ask you something?” 

“Yes.” 

“You said yesterday that I shouldn’t make assumptions about you based on your family.” Dean faltered a little. “Are you…I mea n, do you…Are…” Cas smiled a little and put a hand on his shoulder. 

“Yes, Dean. I’m gay.” Dean nodded once. 

“Oh. Okay. Does anyone else know?” 

“Gabriel does. And our cousin Balthazar.” Dean nodded again. 

“One more question?” 

“Sure.” 

“Can I…Would you… I mean…Would it be okay…if I kissed you?” Dean wasn’t sure why he asked because he was pretty sure he knew the answer. Maybe it was the whiskey. And maybe it was the whiskey that made Cas stub out his cigarette, smile softly, and say, 

“Yes.”


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All right guys, I'm posting in the middle of the night because I have to work in the morning and I'm gonna be dead tired when I get home. So please enjoy some mild smut!

Cas registered the press of Dean’s lips against his. He was faintly aware that this was a _very_ _bad_ idea, but he was finding it hard to care. Dean’s lips were soft and warm and tasted like alcohol and cigarettes. Cas leaned into the kiss and was met with Dean parting his lips in invitation. Their tongues brushed and Dean’s fingers sank into Cas’s hair. Dean took a half step forward and Cas’s back hit the wall behind him. He relaxed into the feeling, letting Dean take control. It had been a long time since he’d been kissed with so much intensity. Dean was kissing him like he was drowning and Cas was his only source of oxygen. Cas felt lightheaded and he knew it wasn’t the whiskey. When they eventually broke apart, Dean rested his forehead against Cas’s so they were breathing the same air.

“Bad idea?”

“Horrible idea.”

“Want me to stop?”

“Hell no.” Dean kissed him again, pressing him against the wall. Cas’s hands found their way up to Dean’s shoulders and then into his hair. Dean whined a little when Cas tugged lighty at the short strands. Dean pressed closer, sliding his thigh between Cas’s legs. The sound that escaped Cas’s throat was somewhere between a moan and a gasp. He felt Dean smirk into the kiss. Then he felt Dean’s hands at the top of his jeans.

“Can I?” Cas wasn’t entirely sure what Dean was asking permission for, but he knew he didn’t want anything to stop.

“Yes.” Cas tugged Dean’s hair again and angled his head to deepen the kiss a little more. Dean popped the button on Cas’s jeans and lowered the zipper. He pushed Cas’s jeans and boxers down just enough to pull him out. Cas groaned at the contact, which only served to spur Dean on. Dean dropped to his knees and looked up at Cas through his eyelashes, his eyes asking a question. Cas nodded and threaded his fingers through Dean’s hair. Dean took him into his mouth and Cas’s head tipped back, thunking gently against the brick. He closed his eyes and tried to keep quiet. He had done quite a few stupid things in his short life, but this…he never imagined anything like this.

Even if he had imagined it, his brain never could have come with anything like what Dean was currently doing to him. Every single nerve in his body was narrowed down to the feel of Dean’s mouth. He felt like he was on fire. The way Dean bobbed his head and swirled his tongue was incredible. Cas tugged on Dean’s hair in warning and managed to choke out,

“Dean…coming.” He expected Dean to pull off, but he stayed where he was and worked Cas down from his high. The fire inside him was replaced with a tranquil warm. Dean pulled off and got back to his feet. Cas was surprised for the second time in the span of a minute when Dean pressed their lips together. Cas could taste himself on Dean’s tongue.

“Good?”

“Very. Allow me?” Cas tucked himself away and redid his jeans before reaching for Dean’s belt.

“You don’t have to, if--.”

“I want to,” Cas cut in. He did. He knew he was nowhere near as skilled as Dean (hard to get practice when he was rarely by himself), but he wanted to return the favor. He switched their positions so Dean’s back was against the wall. Cas undid Dean’s belt, pulled his jeans down a little, and stopped. Instead of boxers, Dean was wearing a pair of dark green silk panties with black lace around the trim. Cas raised an eyebrow and watched Dean’s cheeks turn a light shade of pink. Cas decided it was something they could talk about later if Dean felt like they needed to. He pulled Dean out and sank to his knees.

He had very little experience, but judging by the way Dean was biting his lip and the shallow thrusts into his mouth, Cas guessed he wasn’t too bad. Dean’s fingers tangled in his hair and Cas groaned slightly when he tugged on it. It did feel good.

“Coming, Cas,” Dean warned. Cas made a split second decision to stay where he was. Dean had trusted him, he could trust Dean. Dean’s spilled down his throat and Cas swallowed what he could. He was startled when he was hauled to his feet and pulled into a bruising kiss. Dean really liked kissing. Cas didn’t mind.

“We should go back up,” Cas said once Dean had gotten himself together. “Gabe and Sam will be looking for us.” Dean took his cigarettes out of his pocket.

“One more.” Cas nodded.

“Okay.” Dean lit one then passed over his lighter. There was a long stretch of silence before

Dean said,

“I don’t wear them all the time.” Cas tilted his head for a second before he realized what Dean meant.

“Oh. Okay.”

“I just like the way the fabric feels.”

“Dean, you don’t owe me an explanation. If I had a problem with it I would’ve walked away. And if I had a problem with it, that wouldn’t be a reflection on you, it would be a reflection on me. You should do what makes you comfortable.” “You should, too.” Cas chuckled.

“It’s hardly the same. I can wait until after law school to be my own person. Better late than never.”

“I guess.” Dean didn’t look convinced, but he must have decided it wasn’t his business because he didn’t press it. “So, you’re not gonna freak out about this, right? I mean, that wasn’t your first time, was it?” Cas rolled his eyes.

“No, Dean. I’m hardly a virgin. I had fun.”

“Good. So we can…do this again?” Cas coughed on his cigarette smoke.

“I mean, if we happen to find ourselves in the same place at the same time and we can get time alone, of course.”

“Okay. Awesome.” Dean smiled more to himself than to Cas. Cas didn’t comment on it.

They finished their cigarettes and went back up to the room.

“What the fuck took you so long?” Gabriel demanded the second they walked in.

“We started talking and lost track of time,” Dean said calmly, walking past him. Gabriel looked at Cas. Cas shook his head, telling him to let it go. Gabriel raised an eyebrow, but didn’t say anything. They followed Dean into the other room.

“Pamela’s been blowing up your phone,” Sam said to Dean. “I told her you were in the bathroom. You might wanna call her.” Dean took his phone.

“We should probably just go. It’s almost midnight. She’ll be even more pissed if we’re late.” Dean turned to Cas and Gabriel. “Thanks for the drinks, guys. Cas, thanks for the smoke. After using that vape so much, I forgot how good it feels.”

“Agreed.” Dean and Sam left and the second the door closed, Gabriel turned on Cas.

“What the hell happened?” Cas dropped onto his bed, his legs hanging over the edge as he stared up at the ceiling.

“He kissed me.”

“What?!”

“He kissed me. And then we…did a little more than that.” Cas could hear Gabriel pacing.

“Let me just…let me see if I’ve got this right. Dean Winchester kissed you in what I can only assume was an alley since that’s the only place you ever smoke, and then he gave you a blowjob in an alley?” Cas nodded.

“And I reciprocated.”

“Oh my God.” Cas could hear the grin in Gabriel’s voice. “Oh my God, that is the single most rebellious thing you have _ever_ done. Cas, I’m so proud of you!” Cas sat up.

“Seriously?”

“Dude, a hot guy gave you a blowjob in an alley. Anyone could’ve walked by and seen you. I didn’t know you had that kind of wild streak in you.” Cas shrugged. In truth, he didn’t realize he had that in him either. Dean brought it out. The thirty minutes he’d spent with Dean in that alley had been the most intense and exhilarating thirty minutes of his life. He breathed deeply, trying to still his racing heart. Whatever this was between them, it was purely physical. He had to remind himself not to get too attached.


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's almost 1am and I have to work all day tomorrow. I hate working 2 jobs. Enjoy!

“Why did your parents name you Castiel?” It was three o’clock in the morning and Dean was sitting on the couch in the hotel room, waiting for Sam to get back. It wasn’t like him to be out so late, especially in an unfamiliar city, and Dean was starting to worry. He’d called Cas to take his mind off it.

“What?”

“It just seems like an odd name, so I was wondering if there was any meaning behind it.” He heard Cas sigh on the other end of the line.

“Chuck and Naomi named us all after angels. When Naomi was pregnant with me, they thought I was a girl, so they planned on naming me Cassiel. That’s the angel of Thursday. Well, obviously the doctor got it wrong, so they changed the second ‘s’ to a ‘t’. I go by Cas because it’s shorter and easier and I _hate_ being named after an angel.”

“Why?”

“Because I don’t think parents should force their religious beliefs on their kids like that. We were all named after angels. Chuck and Naomi expect us to act like angels.” Cas chuckled. “It’s funny, really, because if you read the Bible, which I have been forced to do so, so many times, angels are warriors of God. I don’t know where the fluffy wings and halos and harps came from, but they’re not like they are in the movies and on TV.”

“I’ve never read the Bible, but my mom always told me I had angels watching over me. Not sure if I believe that, but I guess it’s a nice thought.” Dean stretched out on the couch. “So what are you doing?”

“Homework. Well, I’m supposed to be, but it’s mind-numbingly boring. I’d much rather be talking to you. What about you?”

“Waiting for Sam. We’re in Delaware for a rally and he went out. I don’t know where, he’s not back yet, and he’s not answering his phone.”

“You’re worried.”

“Yeah. I thought talking to you might take my mind off it.” It had been three weeks since the Habitat for Humanity project and they had been texting almost nonstop. Dean was damn near desperate to see Cas again and he was trying not to let it slip just how much he missed him. They had one night together in an alley and Dean shouldn’t want to see him so badly. “I’ve kinda been thinking about you.”

“Really? You mean you text me every single day because you’re thinking about me? I never would’ve guessed.” Dean rolled his eyes at Cas’s teasing tone, even though he knew Cas couldn’t see.

“Shut up.”

“It’s okay. I’ve been thinking about you, too. Gabriel’s relentless. He keeps trying to interrogate me.”

“Did you tell him?”

“I did. I don’t keep secrets from him. Did you tell Sam?”

“No. He didn’t even ask and I don’t tend to volunteer information about my sex life. He’s my little brother. He doesn’t need to know.”

“I understand. But if he asks?”

“I’ll tell him. There’s no point in lying. Besides, why would I wanna lie about you?” Cas huffed a laugh.

“Don’t sweet talk me, Winchester.” It was Dean’s turn to laugh.

“Oh, sweetheart, that wasn’t sweet talk. Trust me. You’ll know it when you hear it.”

“Mm, is that so?” Cas’s voice had dropped a little and Dean felt his jeans tighten. He groaned.

“Cas, you’re gonna kill me.”

“Hm. Death by untreated erection. Now there’s an obituary I’d like to read.” Dean laughed so hard he almost fell off the couch.

“All right, you win this round.” He heard the click of the lock opening. “Hey, Sam’s back, I gotta go. Talk to you later?”

“Definitely. Goodnight, Dean.”

“‘Night.” Dean tucked his phone into his pocket and crossed his arms as Sam walked in. “Where the hell have you been?”

“I was just out walking around.”

“Seriously? You expect me to believe you were out just walking around for six hours?” Sam took out his phone and unlocked it.

“Here. I took pictures.” He sat beside Dean on the couch. “I’m sorry I didn’t answer you. I was having fun on my own.” Dean flipped through his brother’s photos.

“All right.” He pulled Sam into a hug. “I was just worried. I guess I should get used to it. I can’t have you check in with me every second while you’re at school. You need to have your own life.”

“Thanks, Dean. And I should’ve answered you. With Mom running for president, the risk of something happening to us while we’re out alone is a lot higher. You had every right to be worried. Who were you talking to?”

“Oh. Uh, Cas.”

“Really? You guys exchanged numbers?”

“Yeah.”

“Cool. So did Gabriel and I, but I wasn’t sure if I should tell you.” Dean stiffened a little.

“Sam, I’m not gonna tell you who to be friends with, but I need you to understand that he’s twenty-five. Eight might not seem like a lot of years, but you’re still technically just a kid. I like Gabriel, but we don’t really know him or Cas very well. Please be careful.” Dean expected Sam to roll his eyes at him. Instead, he nodded seriously.

“I know. He’s nice, but if it starts to get weird, I’ll let you know. I need you to trust me. I _can_ take care of myself.” Dean half-smiled.

“I know. And don’t think for a second that I don’t hate that. Sometimes I forget that you don’t need me for everything anymore. You grew up way too fast, Sammy.” Dean got up and ruffled his brother’s hair. “Come on, let’s get some sleep. We’ve got a long day ahead of us tomorrow.” Sam went into the bathroom to brush his teeth and Dean changed into his pajamas. He stretched out on one of the beds and unlocked his phone.

**Dean [4:01am]:** Sam was apparently taking a walk for 6 hours. Weird kid. Did you know he and Gabe exchanged numbers?

 **Angel [4:02am]:** Taking a walk is not weird. No, I didn’t. Gabe didn’t mention it. Is everything okay?

 **Dean [4:02am]:** It is for 6 hours. Yeah, everything’s fine. I just told Sam to let me know if things get weird. I trust your brother, but he’s 25 and Sam’s only 17. The age gap makes me a little uncomfortable.

 **Angel [4:03am]:** That’s understandable. I’ll talk to Gabriel about appropriate conversation topics for teenagers. He’d never do anything to Sam intentionally, but your concerns should be addressed.

 **Dean [4:04am]:** Thanks Cas. I gotta be up in 4 hours. I’m gonna try to get some sleep. Night.

 **Angel [4:04am]:** Goodnight Dean 

Dean made sure his alarm was set before leaving his phone on the nightstand. Sam came out of the bathroom and crawled into the other bed.

“Goodnight, jerk.” Dean smiled.

“‘Night, bitch.”


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bonus chapter this week because I love you guys! Merry Christmas!

Cas paced in front of the couch in the green room. His suit was itchy, his tie was too tight, and he felt like he was suffocating. They were in Alabama and every time someone opened their mouth about Chuck’s platform, Cas had to use every ounce of self-control not to punch them in the face. He was fighting the urge to rake his fingers through his perfectly styled hair when he felt his phone buzz in his pocket.

**Cosmic Cowboy** 🤠 **[2:18pm]:** You at the convention center? 

**Cas [2:18pm]:** Yes? 

**Cosmic Cowboy** 🤠 **[2:18pm]:** West Wing door, take a right, behind the dumpsters 

Cas stared at his phone for a moment before checking the time. He still had about an hour before he was needed. He put his phone back in his pocket and headed for the door.

“Where are you going?” Michael asked.

“I need some air,” Cas said. He followed the instructions he had been given and found Dean leaning against the dumpsters with his vape between his lips. He was dressed in street clothes and he looked _good_ . Dean grinned when he saw him.

“Hey, nice suit. Thought you didn’t have to be daddy’s little windup toy for another hour?”

“The press is everywhere all the time,” Cas said, rolling his eyes. “I hate this suit. I hate this state.”

“Everyone hates this state.”

“Point.” There was a short pause before Dean pocketed his vape and closed the space between them. He grabbed Cas by the waist and pushed him up against the dumpsters. He stopped a hair’s breadth away from Cas’s lips.

“I missed you.”

“I missed you, too.”

“Good.” Cas’s hand found the nape of Dean’s neck and closed the fraction of distance, slotting their mouths together. Oregon had fueled most of Cas’s fantasies over the last three weeks, but they were nothing close to the real thing. Kissing Dean was so much better than he remembered. His lips tasted like cherry this time and Cas got lost in the way Dean’s tongue explored his mouth. They broke apart to breathe the same way they had the first time, forehead to forehead.

“You’re really good at that.” Dean smirked.

“I’ve had a lotta practice.”

“Oh, don’t do that. I don’t want to think about all the other people you’ve kissed.” Dean’s expression turned sheepish.

“If it means anything, you’re better than any of them.” Cas blinked. He could think of a few dozen things to say, ranging from asking if he was serious to making a joke. Instead, he just pressed their lips together again. They were on borrowed time and he didn’t want to waste too much of it talking. He didn’t know if he would see Dean again in person before the first Presidential debate in September and he wanted to take everything he could get.

They kissed until Cas lost track of time. Nothing existed outside of them. The way Dean kissed made Cas feel like he was floating and falling at the same time. It was slow and heated and Cas felt dizzy. Dean’s hands were everywhere, but he was taking care not to mess up Cas’s suit or his hair even though Cas could tell he wanted to. Cas didn’t particularly care about either of those things, but he had an image he had to maintain for Chuck and Dean was respecting that. Something warm bloomed in Cas’s chest. Dean’s phone went off, breaking the moment.

“Damn it.” Dean checked the screen. “And I’m being summoned.” He kissed Cas again. “Are you leaving tonight?”

“Tomorrow morning.”

“You wanna meet somewhere later? I can’t…I want more time with you.” Cas smiled.

“I’ll let you know if I can slip out.”

“Okay. If I don’t see you later…” Dean kissed him deeply. Then he grinned and disappeared back inside. Cas stood there for a minute, trying to catch his breath. Dean Winchester was going to be the death of him.

*** *** ***

“Where are you going?” Cas stopped, his hand on the door handle.

“Out.” Gabriel smirked.

“To see Dean?”

“Would you keep your voice down?” Cas hissed.

“Is that a yes?”

“Yes.”

“Be careful.”

“I will. Cover for me?”

“You know I will.”

“Thank you.” Cas smiled gratefully before leaving the hotel room. Once he was out on the street, he took out his phone to check the location Dean had sent him. He tucked his hands into the pocket of his trenchcoat and started walking. When he got to the park, he scanned the benches. He caught sight of a familiar plaid shirt and went over. Dean stood to meet him and pulled him into a hug. A soft,

“Hey, sweetheart,” was whispered into Cas’s hair and it made his heart jump a little.

“Hello, Dean.” The hug ended, but Dean didn’t take his hands off him. He reached up and touched Cas’s cheek.

“This is ridiculous. I saw you seven hours ago. Please tell me I’m not the only one feeling this.” Cas knew exactly what Dean was talking about. The pull between them. It was like a magnetic force, drawing them together. And when they were apart, something felt like it was missing.

“You’re not.”

“Good. I thought I was going crazy. We just met, what, two months ago?” Cas frowned slightly, unsure of where Dean was going.

“Is this a problem?”

“No,” Dean said quickly. “Sorry, I just…It was scaring me a little. But if you’re feeling it, too, then that’s good. I’m not crazy.”

“Or we’re both going crazy,” Cas joked. Dean chuckled.

“Maybe.” His hand was still on Cas’s cheek. Cas leaned into the touch before pressing their lips together. It was dark out and they were in a secluded part of the park, but it was still the most public place they had ever been in. Cas didn’t care. As soon as his mouth was on Dean’s, nothing else mattered. Dean was kissing him hungrily, his fingers gripping Cas’s hair and messing up the suit he still had on. Dean was kissing him like he might never see him again. Cas’s hand drifted under the hem of Dean’s t-shirt, his fingertips grazing the soft skin. The noise that escaped Dean’s throat was buried in Cas’s mouth.

“Dean--.”

“Not here,” Dean interrupted. “Too open. It’s Alabama.” That was a point Cas hadn’t considered. There was no one around, but it was still too risky. He pressed his forehead against Dean’s.

“When can I see you again?” Dean chewed his lip.

“I’ll figure something out.”

“How?”

“I just will. That’s a promise. Sam has the SATs next weekend, but I’ll figure something out for the weekend after. I’ll find something.” Cas nodded. He could wait two weeks.

“Okay.”

“Okay.”

They kissed for hours after that, completely lost in each other. Wrapped up and warm and safe. They were in their own little bubble where time stood still and they were just two people who wanted to be together. They weren’t Dean Winchester and Castiel Novak, sons of political rivals. They were just Dean and Cas, and Cas wanted to hang on to that for as long he could. They stayed in each other’s arms until Cas’s phone buzzed in his pocket. He didn’t bother to check it. He knew it was Gabriel.

“I have to go.”

“I’ll text you.”

“Goodbye, Dean.”

“Bye, Cas.” Cas walked away with a swelling in his chest and a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach.


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, they're trying to make it work. Enjoy!

“How’d the test go?” Sam sighed.

“I don’t know. I think it went okay.”

“Sam, shut up,” Jessica said from the backseat. “You know you aced it.” Sam turned to look at her as Dean pulled out of the parking lot.

“Yeah, sure. I’ll tell you what, Jess. If I get a perfect score on the SATs, I’ll give a hundred bucks.”

“You don’t have a hundred dollars,” Dean pointed out.

“You do.”

“I’m holding you to that, Winchester,” Jessica said. “I have a witness.” “I don’t even know who’s side to be on right now,” Dean muttered.

“Relax, Dean, there’s no way I got a perfect score.”

“How about we worry about the scores when they come out? For right now, you guys just took a three-hour test. It’s ice cream time.”

“If you want ice cream, just get ice cream,” Sam said. “You don’t have to buy it for everyone.”

“Why are you complaining?” Jessica asked. “I _wish_ I had an older brother to buy me ice cream.” Dean put Baby in park and turned in his seat, extending his hand.

“Dean Winchester, at your service. Available for all your older brother needs.” Sam rolled his eyes.

“Oh my, God.” Jessica laughed.

“You’re hired.”

“I hate you both.” Dean ruffled Sam’s hair.

“Come on. Strawberry and…cookies and cream, right?” Jessica grinned.

“Hey, you remembered!”

“Dean doesn’t forget things that involve food.”

“He’s not wrong.” Dean placed the order then turned in his seat again. “So, Jess, got any colleges in mind?”

“A few, but I’m really looking at Stanford. NYU will probably be a safety school and I can always go to KU if I can’t get in anywhere else.”

“You’re smart,” Dean told her. “I’m sure you’ll get into Stanford.”

“Thanks.”

“Just remember, wherever you end up, it doesn’t matter what the school is. It matters what you do with your time there.”

“That’s Dean’s way of saying don’t spend all your time partying,” Sam said. Dean looked at his brother.

“The keyword in that sentence is all. I would be disappointed in you if you didn’t party a little. I raised you better than that.” Sam laughed.

“All right. I’ll be sure to balance my good decisions and my bad decisions.”

“Excellent.” The carhop brought out their milkshakes and Dean passed them around. “You kids wanna go anywhere? Movies or something?” Sam and Jessica looked at each other.

“I wouldn’t say no to a movie,” Jessica said.

“Sure,” Sam said. Dean put Baby in gear and drove to the movie theater. He took out his wallet and handed Sam some cash.

“Text me when you’re ready to go. And nothing rated R.”

“Yes, Mom,” Sam said. He and Jessica got out and Dean drove home. Once he was in his room, he texted Cas.

**Dean [2:35pm]:** Hey sweetheart

 **Angel [2:37pm]:** Hello Dean

 **Angel [2:37pm]:** How did Sam’s test go?

Something warm curled in Dean’s chest at the knowledge that Cas remembered Sam had the SATs. He had no reason to remember that. It had no bearing on his life, and yet, he not only remembered but thought to ask about it.

**Dean [2:38pm]:** Good I think. Jessica thinks he got a perfect score. Sam said he’d give her $100 if he actually did.

 **Angel [2:38pm]:** If your brother got a perfect score on the SATs he’ll have his pick of colleges. How are things between them?

Another thing Cas had no reason to remember but did anyway. Dean was probably smiling like an idiot at his phone, but he didn’t care.

**Dean [2:39pm]:** Getting somewhere. At least it better be. I dropped them off at the movies a little while ago and told Sam to text me when they’re ready to leave.

 **Angel [2:39pm]:** Don’t force them Dean

 **Dean [2:40pm]:** Cas they’ve known each other for four years. They like each other. I mean come on molasses moves faster than that!

 **Angel [2:40pm]:** 😂😂😂 Leave them alone Dean. Most people don’t meet and drop to their knees in an alley two minutes after finding out their friend might be interested.

 **Dean [2:41pm]:** Well damn. Way to call me out. I don’t exactly remember you complaining.

 **Angel [2:41pm]:** If you ever get a complaint when you’re doing that just stand up and walk away. That person isn’t worth your time and doesn’t deserve your talent.

 **Dean [2:42pm]:** That good?

 **Angel [2:42pm]:** I’ve been thinking about your mouth on me since last weekend. I can’t remember the last time I jerked off this much. Puberty maybe. I’m just glad I’m done with college and survived my finals or this could be a lot worse.

Dean bit his lip. God he wanted to see Cas again. He was still trying to find something that would generate good press if he went. Something Cas might be able to talk his parents into. He _had_ to see him. After that night in the park in Alabama, he hadn’t been able to get those blue eyes and disastrous hair out of his head. He still felt like he was going crazy. He felt like he was drowning and the only way he could breathe was when he was with Cas. It was terrifying and he couldn’t get enough. His only consolation was that Cas felt that same way.

**Dean [2:45pm]:** Shit Cas. I’ve gotta see you. Can we facetime?

Instead of a response, Dean’s phone lit up with a Facetime call from Cas. He smiled as he answered it. Even on the small screen, Cas looked gorgeous.

“Hey, sweetheart.”

“Hello, Dean. Why didn’t we think of this before?”

“Because it’s not the same,” Dean said. “I can see you, but I can’t touch you and that’s not fair.” Cas laughed.

“It’s better, though.”

“It is. Were you serious? Have you really been thinking about me?”

“So much more than I’m comfortable admitting. Gabriel is convinced I’ve gone insane and I can’t help thinking he’s right. But I don’t care.”

“You’re not worried someone else might find out? Someone who might tell your parents?”

“It crossed my mind, but…I don’t care. I just don’t.” Dean grinned at that.

“Good. It’s about time you did something for yourself.”

“That’s what Gabriel told me. Though, I think he thinks this is more than what it is.” Dean raised an eyebrow.

“What do you think this is?”

“I don’t know, Dean. I thought it was just sex, but we’ve only actually done that once.”

“To be fair, we’ve only seen each other twice,” Dean pointed out. He had been under the impression that whatever this was between them was purely physical.

“Point,” Cas agreed. “So it’s physical.”

“ _Very_ physical,” Dean said and Cas rolled his eyes, but he was laughing.

“You’re terrible. And I can’t wait to get my hands on you again. And my mouth.” Dean felt a twitch in his jeans. He closed his eyes and tried to steady his breathing.

“God, I want that. I can still feel your hair under my fingers and taste the smoke in your mouth. I want you to touch me so bad.” Dean could still feel Cas’s lips on him and he knew he shouldn’t, but he undid his jeans and reached his hand into his boxers.

“Dean, are you touching yourself?”

“Yeah.” Dean could barely get the word out. He opened his nightstand drawer and dug around blindly for his bottle of lube.

“Good. Keep doing that.”

“Are you alone?” Dean felt compelled to ask.

“Yes, I’m in my room and my door’s locked. I checked before I called you.”

“Good.” Dean popped the cap on the lube and set his phone down for a minute so he could squeeze some into his hand. He started stroking himself while Cas kept talking.

“That’s it, Dean. Pretend I’m there with you. Imagine it’s me touching you.” Dean closed his eyes and listened to the sound of Cas’s voice as he stroked himself. He was thankful no one else was home because there was no way in hell he was going to be quiet. Not with Cas’s rough voice talking him through one of the dirtiest fantasies he’d ever heard. By the time he spilled over his hand, he was a whimpering mess. When he opened his eyes, Cas’s face was flushed, his mouth open around a silent shout.

“You’re gonna kill me, Cas,” Dean said when he found his voice again. Cas smiled lazily, sated and indulgent.

“Not if you kill me first.”


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 3am update because I have to work all day and I have no idea when I'll be able to get back to my laptop. So enjoy and please pray for me because 13 hours is way too long to work.

“Anna said you’re going to some fundraiser thing in Minnesota?” Gabriel said from Cas’s doorway. Cas looked up from his phone.

“Yes. It’s a charity event to raise money for disenfranchised teens.” Gabriel closed the door and crossed the room.

“Mom and Dad are gonna catch on to what you’re doing, ya know.”

“I’m giving them good press and I’m helping people.” Gabriel stared at him. “Seeing Dean is just an added bonus.”

“Cas, those pictures go everywhere. You can’t keep showing up at the same places as Dean Winchester. Mom and Dad are gonna notice eventually.”

“Gabe, I’m not worried about Chuck and Naomi. I’m being careful. I know how to act in front of the cameras.”

“Please be careful.” Cas smiled reassuringly.

“I’ll be fine.” He was completely certain about that. He and Dean weren’t stupid. They knew how they had to act in public. Neutral, polite smiles, friendly handshakes, and essentially selling the “reaching across party lines” image. They could do that. Cas looked down at his phone.

**Cosmic Cowboy** 🤠 **[1:10pm]:** I miss you 

**Cas [1:10pm]:** I miss you too. We have all weekend.

 **Cosmic Cowboy** 🤠 **[1:11pm]:** I know. Can’t wait.

 **Cas [1:11pm]:** Just us?

 **Cosmic Cowboy** 🤠 **[1:12pm]:** Just us. Sam’s spending the weekend with his friends.

 **Cas [1:12pm]:** Good

“Let me come with you,” Gabriel said and Cas’s head shot up.

“What?”

“Let me come with you,” he repeated. “I won’t get in the way, I promise. Just let me go with you for backup.”

“No.”

“Cas--.”

“No. I’m an adult, Gabriel. I can do this on my own. If I need you, I’ll call you.” Gabriel sighed heavily.

“When I said I wanted you to rebel against Mom and Dad, this wasn’t exactly what I meant.” Cas shrugged.

“I guess Dean brings it out in me.” He went back to his phone.

**Cas [1:14pm]:** It’ll be nice to get out of this house for a few days. Even Gabe’s driving me crazy.

 **Cosmic Cowboy** 🤠 **[1:14pm]:** 😂😂😂 You say that like Gabe doesn’t annoy you every day. I know what you mean though. Sam’s been out a lot lately and mom’s always busy with the campaign so it gets lonely here sometimes.

 **Cas [1:15pm]:** You always have me. Even when I can’t answer you please text me when you’re lonely. Seeing your name on my screen always makes me smile.

 **Cosmic Cowboy** 🤠 **[1:14pm]:** Thanks Cas

“Have you figured out which law school you’re going to?”

“Stanford,” Cas said. He’d made his decision weeks ago. He wanted to go to the West coast. It was the only place he would ever really be able to be himself, no matter which way the election went. It was also his best chance at being able to see Dean more often. If Sam ended up going to Stanford, Dean would definitely visit. It was his best option.

“Good. I think it would be best for you. You need to get as far away from here as you can. And, hey, Balt’s out in Cali.” That was a point Cas had forgotten to consider. He hadn’t seen his cousin in a few years. It would be nice to live near him again. “How about this? Once you get in, we should get an apartment together. I’ll tell Mom and Dad I’m going to keep an eye on you. They’ll buy that. We can both get out.” Cas smiled at that.

“I’d like that.” He hugged his brother. “You annoy the hell out of me, but I do love you, Gabe. And I know you’re only trying to protect me, but I really can take care of myself.”

“I know you can. Doesn’t mean I’m not gonna worry about you.”

“Yes, I know.”

“You’re serious about doing this?”

“Yes.”

“All right. I want you to call me _immediately_ if something happens. Anything. And say hi to Dean and Sam for me.”

“Sam’s not coming.”

“Oh. So it’s just you and Dean?” Cas nodded, not really listening as he typed out a message to Dean.

**Cas [1:17pm]:** You’re welcome 🙂 Everyone should have a support system. What are you doing?

 **Cosmic Cowboy** 🤠 **[1:18pm]:** Taking my break at work. I’m stuck on a double shift today. What about you?

Cas stretched out on his bed and leaned back against the pillows. Gabriel poked his foot.

“Can I?” Cas looked up long enough to see Gabriel holding his laptop.

“Sure.” Gabriel laid down on his stomach and Cas went back to his phone.

**Cas [1:19pm]:** Just hanging out with Gabe. He’s worried about me going to Minnesota by myself.

 **Cosmic Cowboy** 🤠 **[1:19pm]:** He can come if he wants to if he’s really that worried 

**Cas [1:19pm]:** No it’s fine. I can do things on my own. And I wanna see you. 

“Uh, Cas, what’s this?” Cas glanced up.

“Huh?”

“This.” Gabriel turned Cas’s laptop. On the screen were about ten open tabs he had forgotten to close last night. Each one was a YouTube video of a speech Dean had given at various campaign stops. Cas looked at his brother.

“I was bored.”

“Or you were obsessing.”

“I just miss him.” He took his laptop back and pressed play on one of the videos. “He’d make a good politician. He’s confident and he actually believes in what he’s saying.” Gabriel watched.

“Well, maybe you two can face off in the Senate one day.” Cas laughed.

“We’ll probably be on the same side.” He closed out the videos and gave his laptop back to Gabriel. “Here.”

**Cosmic Cowboy** 🤠 **[1:20pm]:** I wanna see you too 

**Cas [1:20pm]:** Gabe says hi by the way before I forget

 **Cosmic Cowboy** 🤠 **[1:20pm]:** He still bugging you? 

**Cas [1:21pm]:** Only always

“Hey, quit talking to your boyfriend and watch a movie with me.” Cas dropped his phone

“He’s not my boyfriend.”

“Right, sorry. Stop talking to the guy you’re traveling across the country to have sex with and watch a movie with me.”

“Gabriel.”

“What? What else am I supposed to call him?”

“He has a name. And I know we’re alone right now, but you need to be careful. I told you because I trust you, and because I’d never hear the end of it if I lied to you, but no one else can know.”

“I’m not stupid, Cas. I won’t tell anyone. I’m actually a little happy for you.”

“Only a little?”

“I mean, I’m happy you found someone who makes you happy, but did it have to be Dean Winchester? I mean, there’re seven billion people in the world. Why the son of Dad’s political rival?” Cas had asked himself that question a few times, but the answer always came up the same. He didn’t know. He shrugged.

“I like him. I can’t explain why, I just do.” Gabriel nodded.

“Well, I think you’re nuts, but more power to you, I guess. Will you watch a movie with me or not?”


	17. Chapter 17

“Why did you want me to come with you instead of Pamela?” Charlie asked as she opened the door to the hotel room. Dean dropped his bag on the floor and sat on one of the beds. He knew the question was coming and he knew he had to be honest. Charlie sat on the other bed and waited for him to answer.

“You’re the only one I trust.”

“Okay?” Dean took a steadying breath before he looked at her. No one knew. Not even Sam.

But he needed to tell someone and Charlie was his most trusted friend.

“I need this to stay between us. No one else can know, not even Sam.”

“Dean, you’re scaring me. What’s going on?”

“It’s nothing bad, it’s just…I’m not just here for the charity event.” Charlie waited. “You know Castiel Novak.” She nodded. “I’ve been…seeing him…kind of. I asked you to come with me so I could meet him because I knew Pamela would be watching me every second.”

“Dean…” Charlie sighed. “You know how incredibly stupid this is, right?” “Yeah, well, I was never one to make smart decisions,” Dean muttered.

“How did this happen?”

“I don’t know. We were drunk. He told me…he told me he’s gay and I asked if I could kiss him. It kinda… spiraled from there.” Charlie was quiet for a minute and Dean shifted uncomfortably. He knew there was a chance Charlie would tell his mother. And there was a chance his mother would be mad. She always said she supported him no matter what, but she might not be able to support this and he wouldn’t blame her.

“Do you like him?” Dean blinked.

“What?”

“Do you like him?”

“I mean, yeah.” Charlie chewed her lip.

“Do you love him?” Dean dropped his eyes to the floor. He really didn’t know. He was feeling something, and it was intense, but he didn’t want to put a name on it until he was sure.

“I don’t know.” Charlie nodded.

“Okay. Everything in me is screaming to call your mother right now and tell her, but I won’t. As long as you promise to keep it out of the papers. This could have major repercussions for you, Castiel, and both your parents’ campaigns.”

“I know. We’ve been careful. And thank you.” Dean half-smiled. Charlie smiled back.

“Thank you for trusting me. So, when do I get to meet the cute boy?”

“Probably at the event. And please be normal. Just until we get back here.”

“I will be completely professional until you tell me otherwise.”

“Why don’t I believe that?” Charlie laughed and Dean laughed with her. He got along well with most of his mother’s staff, but Charlie was his favorite. She was the closest to his age (twenty-nine to his twenty-two) and she was into all the same stuff he was. She was his most trusted confidant after Sam.

“If you decide you’re serious about him, will you tell me?”

“Of course, Charlie. If I ever figure it out, you’ll be the first to know.”

“Something tells me you’ve already figured it out. You just don’t know it yet.” She had a point, but Dean wasn’t going to tell her that. Instead, he picked up his phone.

**Sammy [6:52am]:** Say hi to Cas for me!

 **Dean [7:05am]:** 🙄 Get off your phone and go be a kid

 **Sammy [7:06am]:** I’m not a kid! I’m 18 now! You get off your phone and go see your boyfriend 

**Dean [7:06am]:** He’s not my boyfriend. He’s a friend.

 **Sammy [7:07am]:** A friend with benefits?

 **Sammy [7:07am]:** Gabe told me about Oregon

Dean almost dropped his phone. He probably should’ve guessed Gabriel would say something, but he would’ve rather had Sam ask him.

**Dean [7:08am]:** Okay we’re talking about this when I get back but why didn’t you just ask me?

 **Sammy [7:08am]:** Because I didn’t think you’d tell me 

Dean sighed heavily. He knew Charlie was watching him, but he didn’t bother to look at her. It hurt that Sam thought Dean would keep things from him.

**Dean [7:10am]:** Sammy I’ll tell you anything you wanna know. All you have to do is ask. I might not tell you everything immediately because I don’t think you need to know but if you ask I’ll tell you.

 **Sammy [7:11am]:** I know. I just thought it might be too personal. I was kinda waiting for you to tell me but I figured you wouldn’t and I thought you should know that I know.

 **Dean [7:11am]:** Are you mad? 

**Sammy [7:12am]:** Why would I be mad? I think it’s kinda stupid but…you can’t help who you like. Just be careful.

 **Dean [7:12am]:** I’m supposed to say that to you. Be good while I’m gone. And hey. Kiss the girl already. She likes you but she’s not gonna wait forever.

“Giving your brother girl advice?”

“Not advice. More like an order,” Dean said, tossing his phone onto the bed beside him. “We don’t have to be anywhere until five. I’m gonna take a nap. If you touch my phone while I’m asleep, I will kill you.” Charlie grinned.

“It’s cute how you think you could actually do that.” She got up and kissed his cheek. “Get some sleep, Dean. I’ll wake you up.”

*** *** ***

Dean tugged at the cuffs of his dress shirt and straightened his tie. Charlie was sitting beside him, perfectly professional, but Dean knew that wouldn’t last. He was trying to pretend he wasn’t watching the door, but he couldn’t help it. He was itching to see Cas again. He was trying to occupy himself when he felt a familiar magnetic pull. His eyes snapped to the door. Cas stopped in the entryway and scanned the room. He smiled when their eyes locked and he nodded once. Dean nodded back. He knew how to act in public. Polite smiles and handshakes. Selling the image of two political opponents meeting in the middle for the greater good. Or something along those lines.

“Dude,” Charlie said when he and Cas broke eye contact, “if you were in a cartoon, your eyes would be bugging out in little heart shapes right now.” Dean turned to her. “Oh, you’ve got it bad. This is gonna be fun.” Dean groaned. This was _not_ going to be fun.

The event was only two hours, but the time seemed to drag. By the time Charlie was leading him to the waiting car, Dean was itchy all over again. Seeing Cas wasn’t enough. He needed to touch him. Kiss him. They went up to the hotel room and Dean paced. Charlie didn’t say anything, but he could feel her watching him. He had ditched his suit for plainclothes the second they got back and now he was just waiting.

“You’re gonna wear a hole in the floor,” Charlie said after half an hour.

“I know.” He stopped pacing. “Are you gonna stay?” Charlie smirked.

“I’ll be in the next room if you need me, but I’ll give you two your space. Believe it or not, I’m actually on your side.” Dean smiled.

“I know you are. I knew you would be.” A knock at the door broke the moment. Charlie broke into a grin. Dean shook his head, silently begging her not to be too intense. He crossed the room, took a deep breath, and opened the door.


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm exhausted and I have to be up for work in 3 hours, but I can't sleep, so here's an update. Please enjoy!

Cas was barely in the room before Dean had him up against the door. He was vaguely aware that someone else was in the room, but Dean’s lips were on his and Cas didn’t care about anything else.

“God, I missed you,” Dean whispered between kisses.

“I missed you, too.” They broke apart and Cas stared into Dean’s eyes, getting lost in a never-ending sea of green. Someone cleared their throat and Dean jumped back.

“Shit, right. Uh, Cas this is Charlie. Charlie, Cas.” He stepped out of the way so Cas could shake Charlie’s hand. He recognized her, but only barely. She was a member of Mary Winchester’s security team. That made Cas a little nervous, but if Dean trusted her, then he figured he could, too.

“Relax,” Charlie said after releasing his hand. “I’m just here to make sure Dean doesn’t disappear. He’s all yours. If you guys need anything, I’ll be in the next room.” She winked and closed herself in the adjoining room. Cas turned back to Dean and found him blushing a little.

“Sorry. Couldn’t get Pamela to let me come here without security. Charlie’s cool, though. She won’t tell anyone.” Cas nodded.

“If you trust her, then I trust her.” Dean crossed the room and pressed their lips together again. Cas melted into it, his fingers finding their way into Dean’s hair. He was only slightly aware when Dean pushed him back onto one of the beds. He registered the mattress and the sheets, but only just barely. His sole focus was the feel of Dean’s lips against his. The way Dean’s hands slipped under his t-shirt and trailed across his skin.

“Can I?” They had done this once before and he knew Dean would ask every time.

“Yes. Consider this blanket consent for the rest of the night. If I want you to stop, I’ll tell you.” The smile on Dean’s face was worth the extra words that would save time in the long run. Cas sat up a little to kiss him again before pulling his shirt over his head. He tossed it somewhere on the floor. Dean’s shirt joined his a moment later and Cas settled back against the pillows, Dean’s body a warm, steady weight against his.

They kissed for a while, hands unhurried and soft as they explored the newly exposed skin. Cas tried to ignore the goosebumps Dean’s touch left in its wake. He didn’t understand how they were possible when he felt like he was burning up inside. Everything with Dean was fire and heat and Cas felt like he might actually die if it ever stopped. He wanted…he _needed_ more, but he couldn’t ask without breaking their kiss and he wasn’t sure he’d be able to breathe without it. He shifted slightly, Dean’s thigh sliding between Cas’s legs. Cas moved against him and Dean seemed to get the message. He reached between them and fumbled Cas’s jeans open. He pulled them, and his boxers, down as far as he could without breaking the kiss. Cas kicked them the rest of the way off. Dean’s lips moved to Cas’s neck. He knew he’d have a mark in the morning, or maybe more than one, but he didn’t care. He wanted Dean to claim him.

Dean moved down his body, leaving a trail of hot, open-mouth kisses in his wake. Cas’s stomach curled when Dean’s lips brushed under his navel and then down to his thighs. He was specifically avoiding the one place Cas wanted him most and Cas knew it. He was being teased and he was absolutely helpless to do anything about it. He couldn’t form words beyond Dean’s name and a string of curses that would’ve impressed even Gabriel. Cas felt Dean smirk against his inner thigh before he wrapped his lips around Cas’s leaking tip. Cas groaned and tried to buck his hips. Dean’s hands gripped his hips to keep him in place as he swallowed him down. At some point, Cas’s eyes had closed. He forced them open only to find Dean staring at him, green eyes nearly black with arousal.

Somehow, it was even better than Cas remembered. He wanted it to last, but he knew he couldn’t. It wasn’t long before he was tugging on Dean’s hair and choking out a warning. Just like last time, Dean didn’t move. He worked Cas through his orgasm, then wiped his mouth and crawled up the bed to seal their lips together. Just like last time, Cas could taste himself on Dean’s tongue and it made him dizzy with something he couldn’t quite put a name on. Not yet. He kissed Dean hungrily. He knew he should reciprocate, but he wanted something else. He just had to ask for it. Dean ditched his jeans and boxers and climbed back onto the bed.

“Dean,” Cas said before he could lose his nerve, “I want…I want you…” He never did finish the sentence, but Dean seemed to get it.

“Are you sure?” Cas nodded.

“Yes.” He sat up and fished his jeans from the floor. He pulled a small bottle of lube from the pocket. Dean chuckled.

“You came prepared.”

“In case you wanted to.”

“Only if you’re sure.” Dean’s voice was gentle. Cas pressed the bottle into Dean’s hand.

“Please.” It came out almost desperate. He settled against the pillows again, his head falling back as Dean started to work him open. Like he’d told Dean, he was hardly a virgin, but it felt different this time. He couldn’t quite pin down why and he chose not to dwell on it. Dean’s fingers brushed over his prostate and Cas moaned.

“Found it,” Dean teased. Cas couldn’t find the words to retort and even if he could, he wasn’t sure they would make it past his lips. “Ready?” Cas nodded fiercely, leaving no room for doubt. Dean’s weight settled over him again. Dean’s lips covered his and he slowly sank in. Every sound that escaped Cas’s throat was lost in Dean’s mouth.

“Dean,” Cas groaned when he was fully inside.

“Fuck,” was all Dean got out before he started to move. Cas was thankful that Dean kept kissing him because he felt like he was burning and drowning at the same time. Dean’s mouth against his was the only thing keeping him from losing himself completely. The faint taste of himself still on Dean’s tongue was the only thing keeping him tethered to reality. He needed that. At least for the next few minutes.

Dean reached between them and stroked Cas back to full hardness. Cas wanted Dean to finish first, but he knew he wouldn’t last too long. And judging by the pace Dean was setting, he didn’t want him to. Cas decided Dean would get what he wanted one way or another, so he let himself spill over Dean’s hand. A warm, tranquil feeling flooded his veins. Dean picked up his pace a little, his thrusts falling out of a rhythm before he stilled, his body tensing up. Cas felt Dean release inside him and a different sort of warmth spread under his skin.

Dean stayed on top of him. Even after he pulled out, he didn’t move. He covered every inch of Cas’s body with his own and kissed him into the mattress. Cas didn’t protest. He was warm and safe and, for once in his life, he was happy. He wanted to stay there forever. But reality set in soon enough, and eventually, Dean was untangling himself. He left the bed and came back with a damp washcloth. He cleaned them both, tossed the wet sheet to the floor, and wrapped his arms around Cas. He trailed his lips down Cas’s neck, leaving feather-light kisses everywhere. They stayed like that for hours, completely caught up in each other.

“I should probably get back to my own hotel,” Cas said once the high wore off and reality set in completely. He moved to get up, but Dean’s hold on him tightened.

“Stay.”

“What?” Dean looked at him.

“You don’t have to, but…I want you to stay.” He shouldn’t. He knew he shouldn’t. That wasn’t what this was. They weren’t…together. Dean was still looking at him like his leaving would be the end of the world. There was something in his eyes that Cas decided he must be imagining. He stayed where he was and fell asleep to the sound of Dean’s steady breathing. It was the best sleep he’d gotten in years.


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Posting at 1am because I thought I had the day off from work, but I don't and I don't wanna forget. Enjoy!

Dean woke up well past his alarm. He blinked the sleep from his eyes and took in his surroundings. He and Cas were tangled in the sheets, every inch of their bodies touching. Dean pulled back a little so he could look at Cas. For the first time since they met, he looked completely relaxed. Dean pressed his lips against Cas’s neck. He didn’t want to wake him up, but he couldn’t help himself. He also couldn’t help thinking that he wanted to wake up like this every morning. Cas woke up twenty minutes later. As soon as Dean was sure he was conscious, he moved on top of him and kissed him deeply. Cas hummed softly and melted into it.

“Good morning.”

“‘Morning, sweetheart.”

“What time is it?” Dean reached for his phone on the nightstand.

“A little past ten-thirty.” Cas groaned.

“Too early.” Dean chuckled.

“Come on. I want breakfast.” He did, but Cas dragged him into another kiss and he got lost in the feeling of warm skin against his. They stayed like that, lost in each other, until someone knocked on the door.

“You two better be decent!” Charlie called. Dean rolled his eyes. Cas looked absolutely mortified.

“Relax,” Dean whispered in his ear. He brushed his lips against Cas’s temple. The door opened and Charlie walked in with a rolling cart from room service.

“Figured you’d want breakfast,” she said. Dean grinned.

“You complete me, Charlie.” She laughed and went back into her own room. Dean untangled himself from the sheets and pulled on his boxers. Cas sat up and rubbed his eyes.

“I should go.”

“Why?” Cas tilted his head a little, like he was trying to figure out why Dean would ask. Dean sat on the bed in front of him. “You can go if you want. I just…wanted to spend some time with you.” Dean cleared his throat. “But if you just want this to be about sex then you’re free to go.” Cas looked like he was weighing his options.

“What do _you_ want this to be?”

“I like you, Cas, but I know that your situation makes this difficult. I’d…I’d like to call you my boyfriend, but I get it if you can’t do that.” Cas was silent for another few minutes. Dean tried to keep his heartbeat under control.

“I’d like that, Dean, but we wouldn’t be able to tell anyone, outside of the people who already know. Are you okay with that?”

“Cas, I want you in whatever way you’re willing to give yourself to me. If that means this stays between us, then that’s fine.” Cas finally smiled and Dean felt like he could breathe again. “So we’re doing this?”

“Yeah.”

Dean and Cas stayed in bed the rest of the day. It was really the only place they could be together without anyone knowing. Dean was okay with that. They watched TV, made out, watched more TV, ate lunch, and by the time they got up to shower, it was nearing five o’clock.

Cas went back to his own hotel a few hours later and Dean had to force himself to let him go. “Something you wanna tell me?” Charlie asked once the door was closed.

“What?”

“Come on, Dean. I heard you guys last night.” Dean should probably be embarrassed, but Charlie had seen, and definitely heard, worse.

“Okay, so? We had sex. You knew we were going to.” Charlie’s expression was a cross between sympathetic and exasperated.

“Dean. I _heard_ you. I’ve heard you having sex before and that…it wasn’t just sex.” She waited for him to deny it. He couldn’t. She was right.

“Look, I dunno. What do you want me to say?”

“I want you to be honest with me. And with yourself.”

“Honest to God truth, I don’t know. I like him. He likes me. But it’s more complicated than that.” Dean sighed. “I know what I want, I think. I don’t think he does. So I’m just gonna wait for him to figure it out.” Charlie nodded.

“Okay. Get some sleep. We’ve got an early flight.”

*** *** ***

“Dean, are you listening to me?” Dean looked up from his phone and realized Sam had been trying to talk to him.

“I’m sorry, what?”

“Who are you texting?” Sam paused. “Is it Cas?” Dean glanced back down at his phone and shrugged. “You just saw him two days ago.”

“I know.”

“So what the hell? You can’t stop texting him for five minutes and talk to me?” Guilt churned in Dean’s stomach. He set his phone aside and made deliberate eye contact with his brother.

“You’re right. I’m sorry. I’m listening.” Sam rolled his eyes.

“All I was saying was that Jess and I are gonna start touring campuses soon.” Dean frowned slightly.

“Are you gonna pick your college based on where Jessica goes? Because I like her a lot, but you shouldn’t make this kind of decision based on a girl.”

“Why not? You said the school doesn’t matter. What I do with my time there does.”

“That’s true, but if you’re only going to a certain school because of a pretty girl, you might end up somewhere you don’t wanna be. I’m not saying she can’t be a factor, but she shouldn’t be the main factor.”

“Really? Or are you just afraid I’ll decide to go to Stanford with her? I know you want me close to home, but that’s not your decision to make.”

“I never said it was.”

“Then let me pick the college I go to based on what I want instead of what you think I need! I’m not a kid, Dean! I don’t need you to hold my hand! I’m capable of making my own decisions!”

“I know that, Sammy, I just--.”

“Stop calling me that.” Sam got up and went to leave. He stopped at the door and turned back around. “I know you were there for me and Mom, but you are _not_ Dad.” Sam walked out of Dean’s room and slammed the door behind him. Dean winced at the sound. He and Sam had gotten into fights before, of course they had, but none of them ever ended with one of them walking away like that. Their fights always escalated until one of them talked the other down. Neither of them ever walked away until they were okay again. Dean grabbed his phone. Without thinking, he called Cas.

“Hello, Dean.”

“Hey, Cas. Sorry, I should’ve asked if I could call you. Are you alone?”

“Gabe’s with me.”

“Oh.”

“Are you okay? You don’t sound okay.” Dean chuckled weakly.

“Yeah, I’m okay. I had a fight with Sam.”

“About college?”

“That and Jessica. I know he likes her, I like her, too, but people don’t always stay together forever and I don’t want him to end up at a college he doesn’t really like just because she’s going there. He got mad. He thinks I’m trying to tell him what to do. I just want him to make good decisions. I feel like that’s not asking too much. Is it?”

“I don’t think so, but it’s not my place to say. You should wait a while and then talk to Sam again when you’re both in better headspaces. And you also have to remember that Sam isn’t a kid anymore. He…hold on, Gabe wants to talk to you.” Dean heard some shuffling over the line and then Gabriel’s voice in his ear.

“Hey, Deano. Listen, Cassie’s right. Sam’s not a kid anymore. I know you want him to be. I still hate that Cassie doesn’t need me anymore. Sam’s growing up and the more you try to help him, the more he’s gonna push you away. I can try to talk to him for you if you want, but the best thing you can do is let him make his own decisions. He has to make mistakes to learn from them.”

“You’re right. I know that. And if I were you, I’d be giving myself the same advice. Thanks, Gabe.”

“You’re welcome. Here’s your boyfriend.”

“Thank you, Gabriel. You can leave now,” Dean heard Cas say. He laughed.

“All right, enough about me. What’s going on with you?”


	20. Chapter 20

Cas smiled for the pictures, made polite conversation with anyone who engaged him, and kept up the appearance of the perfect son, but inside he was just waiting until he could get back to the hotel so he could text Dean. Barely two weeks had passed since the weekend in Minnesota and with each day that passed, the ache in his chest got deeper. He missed Dean. They texted every day, they talked on the phone at least twice a week, and they Facetimed whenever they could, but it wasn’t enough. He had to see him. In person.

By the time Cas finally got back to the room he was sharing with Gabriel, he was exhausted. He changed out of his suit and into a pair of worn-in pajama pants and a t-shirt. He curled up on his bed and took out his phone.

**Cas [8:10pm]:** Hello Dean

 **Comic Cowboy** 🤠 **[8:10pm]:** Hey sweetheart. How’s life on the road? 

**Cas [8:11pm]:** Hell. Please save me. I miss you.

 **Comic Cowboy** 🤠 **[8:11pm]:** I miss you too 

**Cas [8:12pm]:** How are things with Sam?

 **Comic Cowboy** 🤠 **[8:12pm]:** Not great. He’s been staying with Jessica and her family. He won’t talk to me. The only reason I know he’s okay is because Jess keeps me updated. Mom’s not worried. I just wish he would let me apologize.

Cas looked up when the bed shifted. Gabriel laid down next to him.

“How’s Dean?” Cas showed him the screen. “Oh. Sam’s been texting me. I didn’t know they were still fighting.” Gabriel took out his phone. Cas went back to his.

**Cas [8:13pm]:** I’m sorry Dean. I wish I could say something to help. I’m sure Sam will come around eventually. He’s your brother, he loves you.

 **Comic Cowboy** 🤠 **[8:13pm]:** I know. I just wanna apologize but I wanna make sure he’s actually listening. I don’t wanna do it over text.

 **Cas [8:14pm]:** I understand. Gabe says he can talk to him if you want. 

**Comic Cowboy** 🤠 **[8:14pm]:** It’s okay. This is my fault. I need to be the one to fix it. How did we get back on to me? What are you doing?

 **Cas [8:15pm]:** I’m at the hotel with Gabe. We’re flying back to Illinois tomorrow. I hate this. We’re both flying all over the country all the time and yet we’re rarely in the same state. How does that work?

 **Comic Cowboy** 🤠 **[8:15pm]:** I wish I knew. Sam said he and Jess are gonna be doing college tours soon. If we’re on speaking terms by then maybe I’ll go with them. I know they’re gonna check out Stanford. You were thinking about going there, right?

 **Cas [8:16pm]:** I’ve actually made my decision. I’m definitely going but it would be a good idea to see the campus. I’ll run it by Gabe.

“Hey, how would you feel about touring college campuses?” Gabriel looked up from his own phone.

“Depends. What’s your angle?”

“Dean said Sam’s going on college tours with his girlfriend. Dean said he might go with them if they’re on speaking terms and they’re going to Stanford.”

“So, a chance to check out your first choice of schools and see your boyfriend.” Gabriel grinned. “I like the way you think. Mom and Dad should be cool with it, but why do you want me to go?”

“It would seem less suspicious.”

“Yeah. Me. Touring college campuses. That’s not suspicious at all.” Cas laughed.

“Come on, Gabe. Do you wanna go?”

“Yeah, sure.” Cas went back to his phone.

**Cas [8:19pm]:** Gabe’s in. So get your shit together.

 **Comic Cowboy** 🤠 **[8:19pm]:** Thank you. Very helpful. I’ll try calling him after the weekend. He does deserve some uninterrupted time with his girlfriend. And I think I deserve some face to face time with my boyfriend.

 **Cas [8:20pm]:** If you can find an excuse to get us in the same place I wouldn’t say no 

**Comic Cowboy** 🤠 **[8:20pm]:** I’m working on it. In the meantime let me know the next time you’re completely alone. I have a surprise for you 😉

 **Cas [8:21pm]:** I’ll let you know as soon as I get home 

*** *** ***

It turned out, Dean’s surprise was a full-length mirror selfie in a pair of black, lacy panties and absolutely nothing else. Cas chewed his lip. He had a few options for how to respond, but he went with the one he thought Dean would appreciate the most. He got off his bed and dug around in his dresser. For his twenty-first birthday, Gabriel had gotten him both a real gift and a gift that Cas had been adamant he would return. And he probably would have if Gabriel had given him the receipt. Now, he might actually have to thank his brother.

Cas found what he was looking for. A pair of cobalt blue, silk boxers. They were a little snug, but that wasn’t much of a problem for what he planned to do with them. He put them on, raked his fingers through his hair even though he knew it wouldn’t help, and took a picture. He sent it to Dean, then wrapped himself in his bathrobe and laid on his bed. He wasn’t sure what he was expecting, but a minute later he had an incoming Facetime call from Dean. He grinned and answered it.

“Guess that means you liked it?”

“Shit, Cas. Warn a guy! I was going over a speech with my mom!”

“Oh. Sorry. But in my defense, you started it.”

“Yes, I did. And I think you won because I just told her I had to pee and bolted. I’m hiding out in the bathroom.” Cas laughed.

“Real smooth, Winchester.”

“Oh, bite me, Novak.”

“I will if you really want me to.” Cas watched Dean bite back a moan.

“I hate you so much right now.” Cas laughed again. “Seriously. I might actually kill you the next time I see you.”

“All right, all right, I’m sorry. Finish what you were doing and call me when you’re alone.”

“Fine. Hopefully I can will this away before my mom starts to wonder what’s taking me so long.” Cas laughed a third time and Dean hung up on him. He probably deserved that. It didn’t wipe the smile from his face.


	21. Chapter 21

“You got everything?” Sam leveled Dean with Bitchface #27.

“Ask me one more time and I’m telling Benny to leave without you.” Dean raised his hands in mock surrender.

“Okay, okay. What time is Jessica gonna be here?”

“She should be here in a few minutes.” Dean nodded. He watched as Sam tucked a loose strand of his hair behind his ear before lifting his suitcase into the back of the car. It had taken almost a month, but he had finally let Dean apologize. They were okay for the moment, but Dean was having trouble walking the line between being a good brother and being a helicopter parent. He just wanted Sam to be okay.

“Thanks for letting me tag along.”

“Like you would’ve taken no for an answer,” Sam muttered.

“Please don’t start. We already talked about this and Jessica doesn’t need to see us fighting.” That seemed to calm Sam down. Dean understood what was happening. Sam never really had a rebellious phase when he was in his early teens. He was always a model student and a good son. Now that he was going off to college, he wanted to find himself, and he felt like Dean was suffocating him. That was fair, but Dean needed his brother to see his side of things. Dean had been raising Sam since the day their father walked out on them. He only wanted what was best for him and he wanted to protect him.

“Hi, Sam! Hey, Dean!” Dean had to grin when he saw Jessica. He really did like her. She was good for Sam.

“Hey, kiddo.” Dean gave her a hug.

“Hi, Jess.” Sam hugged her, too, and Dean rolled his eyes.

“Sam, kiss your girlfriend.” Jessica giggled, Sam’s cheeks flushed red, and Dean smirked. Sam pulled Jessica in for a kiss and gave Dean the finger behind her back. “That’s my boy.”

“If you’re done embarrassing me.”

“Aw, come on, Sam. He’s your brother, it’s his job.” Jessica pecked his cheek. Sam put her suitcase in the trunk and held the car door open for her. Dean smiled to himself. Barely eighteen and already a gentleman. He got in the car and sat next to Charlie. Pamela had made her Dean’s personal bodyguard after Minnesota and he was grateful for that. Benny drove them to the airport and Dean went through his usual routine as the plane took off. He was surprised when Sam reached over and held onto his arm. Maybe they were more okay than he thought.

When they landed, Charlie secured their car while they got their luggage. In addition to Stanford, they were also touring UC Berkeley and UC Santa Barbara, but Dean had a feeling neither of them really wanted to go anywhere other than Stanford. They had to have safety schools, though. Just in case. Once they were in the car, Dean took out his phone.

**Dean [4:13pm]:** Just landed in Cali. Heading to the hotel.

 **Angel [4:13pm]:** We’re boarding the plane in about ten minutes. Should be there in a few hours. 

“Gabe said they’re boarding the plane soon,” Sam said.

“Yeah, Cas said the same thing.”

“It’ll be nice to finally put faces to the names,” Jessica said, reminding Dean that she hadn’t actually met either of them before.

“How can you _not_ know what they look like? Their pictures are everywhere.”

“One, I don’t tend to read tabloids. Two, I’m not following the election coverage because I already know who I’m voting for. Three, if you’re gonna have that attitude, you can sleep on the couch.” Jessica’s tone was teasing, but Sam snapped his mouth shut.

“Sam, I’ve changed my mind,” Dean said. “She should absolutely be the main factor in where you go to college. She’ll keep you in line for me.” Sam kicked him. Dean narrowed his eyes and kicked back.

“Boys, behave,” Charlie chided with a fond smile.

“He started it,” Dean complained.

“Sometimes I forget you’re supposed to be the oldest.” Dean huffed and went back to his phone.

**Dean [4:15pm]:** Get here as soon as you can. Everyone’s ganging up on me. 

**Angel [4:15pm]:** Aw. Did you lose a battle of wits to your 18 year old brother and his girlfriend?

 **Dean [4:16pm]:** CAS!!!! YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO BE ON MY SIDE!!!!

 **Angel [4:16pm]** 😂😂😂 

Dean put his phone back in his pocket and crossed his arms, focusing his attention out the window. It was a short drive to the hotel. They had booked three suites on the top floor. One for Sam and Jessica, one for Dean and Charlie, and one for Charlie for when Cas inevitably stayed the night with Dean. They got settled in while Charlie went in search of food. Dean sat on one of the beds and took his phone back out.

**Angel [4:21pm]:** Dean?

 **Angel [4:21pm]:** I was just teasing

 **Angel [4:21pm]:** Are you seriously mad?

 **Angel [4:22pm]:** We’re boarding now. I’ll text you when we land.

 **Dean [4:25pm]:** I know you won’t get this until after you land but I’m not mad. I know you were just joking. Can’t wait to see you. 😘

Another text popped up on his screen before he put his phone away.

**Sammy [4:25pm]:** Should I have brought my noise-canceling headphones? Or some earplugs?

 **Dean [4:26pm]:** 🙄🙄🙄 Get your mind outta the gutter kid. Me and Cas will be conducting ourselves like adults this weekend.

Through the wall, he heard Sam and Jessica laughing. Huh. Thin walls. Good to know.

**Sammy [4:26pm]:** 🙄🙄🙄 Sure you will. You can barely go two hours without talking to him and you’ve never conducted yourself like an adult a day in your life but yeah you’re definitely gonna do that this weekend. I’ll have Charlie pick up some earplugs from the drugstore.

Only Sam could convey his exact sarcastic tone in a text. Dean found himself laughing at the fact that he could actually _hear_ Sam saying those words to him.

**Dean [4:27pm]:** Shut up Sammy. Like you and Jess are gonna be so pure. 

The laughter from the other side of the wall stopped and Dean smirked.

**Sammy [4:27pm]:** 😳 Shut up

No snappy retort. No underlying sarcasm.

**Dean [4:28pm]:** Come over here right now

He never got a response, but a minute later Sam was closing the door behind him. He sat across from Dean on the bed.

“You and Jessica haven’t done anything yet, have you?”

“Well, I wouldn’t say that, but we’ve never,” Sam coughed, “you know, actually had sex.”

“Okay. I know this is a weird thing to talk about, but if you need anything from me, let me know. I want you to be safe.” Sam stared at him for a long time.

“Please stop saying that. You’re making me feel like I can’t make my own decisions because I might make the wrong one and something bad will happen to me. You can’t keep trying to handle me with kid gloves. Please, Dean. You know I’ll always come to you if something happens, but you have to let me make my own choices. Even the really, really stupid ones. I don’t need you to make sure I never get into trouble. I need you to be there to help me get out of it.”

“Okay. But in this case, I seriously want you to be safe. STDs don’t go away. So be careful. Always use condoms unless you have proof that the other person is clean. Get tested regularly. And please for the love of God do not get anyone pregnant before you’re married.”

“I got it. And, Dean, I know this isn’t easy on you. I know you’re not acting like this on purpose. The election is stressing Mom out, all the change is stressing you out, and you’re stressing me out. One of us was bound to snap eventually. I just figured it would be you.”

“Thanks, Sam.”

“You know what I mean. Just…maybe try to focus your stress somewhere else. Okay?”

“Okay. Now get back to your girl. Charlie should be back in a few minutes with food and I’m gonna need some alone time with my bacon cheeseburger.”


	22. Chapter 22

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the unusually late update. I had to work all day. Hope you all enjoy!

Cas really had planned on waiting until the plane landed before he texted Dean, but two hours into the flight, Gabriel was getting on his nerves.

**Cas [6:52pm]:** How much time do you think I’m looking at if I shove Gabe out of the emergency hatch?

 **Cosmic Cowboy** 🤠 **[6:53pm]:** Murdering your own brother? Probably life sweetheart. 

**Cas [6:53pm]:** I could jump bail. We could run away together.

 **Cosmic Cowboy** 🤠 **[6:53pm]:** I wouldn’t say no to that but I kinda like Gabe. Maybe just knock him out for the rest of the flight.

 **Cas [6:54pm]:** I just might do that

“Cas, you’re gonna see him in two hours. Put your phone away and talk to me.”

“Gabriel, I’ve been talking to you for two hours,” Cas sighed. “I’m gonna take a nap. Wake me when we land.”

Cas didn’t actually sleep, but he kept his eyes closed, evened out his breathing, and Gabriel didn’t bother him for the rest of the flight. They found their luggage and took a cab to the hotel. They probably could’ve hired a car, but Cas hated doing that. Gabriel went to check them in and Cas left his luggage with his brother. He wandered into the bar and spotted Dean nursing a drink. He smiled and went over.

“You know, you shouldn’t drink alone.” Dean jumped and nearly knocked his drink over. Cas laughed.

“Damn it, Cas. Don’t do that.”

“My apologies.” He took the empty barstool to Dean’s right and ordered a bourbon. “What are you doing down here?”

“Getting buzzed. Why’d you walk in here?”

“I just spent four hours on a plane with Gabe. I need a real drink.” “Point.” Dean smiled softly. Cas sighed.

“How much have you had to drink?” Dean stared into his whiskey.

“Three? I’m pretty sure this is number three.” Cas chuckled.

“All right. I’m cutting you off. Let me catch up, at least.”

Dean didn’t order another drink. They sat in comfortable silence while Cas nursed his bourbon. He was surprised, but grateful that Gabriel hadn’t followed him. His brother must have realized he needed some space. On the bar, Dean’s phone vibrated. He picked it up.

“And that would be Sammy. Apparently he and Gabe decided we’re all going to dinner. They’ll be down in a minute.”

*** *** ***

After introductions, dinner was filled with chit chat and simple pleasantries. Cas spent most of the time talking with Sam and Jessica about college and trying to ignore Dean’s hand on his leg. He knew exactly what Dean was doing and he was trying not to play into it. Dean’s hand climbed higher and Cas kicked him under the table.

“Stop it,” he hissed. Dean smirked and leaned a little closer.

“Make me.” Cas rolled his eyes. He pushed his chair back.

“I’m going outside,” he said when Charlie looked at him. She nodded. Cas went outside, ducked into an alley, and lit a cigarette. Dean joined him a minute later. “You’re an asshole.” Dean grinned.

“Yeah, yeah.” He lit his own cigarette and leaned against the wall.

“Sam and Jessica seem set on Stanford as their first choice.” Dean nodded slowly.

“I know.” He flicked some ash off his cigarette. “You’re definitely going?”

“If I’m accepted, yes.” Cas wasn’t worried. He was more than qualified to get in. He also knew Chuck and Naomi would pull strings if they had to, but he didn’t like to think about that. He didn’t want his education that way.

“Then I’ll have all my favorite people in one place,” Dean said with a shrug. “It might not be so bad. And I want Sam to be happy.”

“I’m one of your favorite people?”

“Cas, you’re my boyfriend. You’re right after my family on my list of favorite people.” Dean let out a long stream of smoke. Cas smiled softly. “I like that.”

“What? Me saying boyfriend?” Cas nodded.

“I haven’t actually had a boyfriend before.”

“I kinda figured that. Most people don’t like to deal with secrecy. They don’t get that some people can’t just be out and proud.”

“And you’re sure you’re okay with it?”

“Cas, I’ve never been more sure about anything.” Dean crushed his cigarette under his boot and put his hand on Cas’s shoulder. “It sucks that we can’t just…be together, but that’s just how life is sometimes. I’ll take what I can get.” Cas dropped his cigarette and stepped closer, drawing Dean into a hug. He wanted to kiss him, but he needed this first. Dean held him tightly. Cas melted into the warmth of Dean’s body. He fought back the swarm of butterflies in his stomach. He knew everything about what they were doing was reckless, but he was past the point of caring. He pulled back and pressed his lips against Dean’s in a soft kiss.

“We should go back in.”

“One more minute.”

That one more minute turned into twenty. At some point, Cas’s back had hit the wall behind him, but it never really registered. Nothing registered beyond the press of Dean’s lips and the taste of cherry pie on his tongue. Their kisses were slow and deep. It was the way Cas had always imagined kissing someone would be. They didn’t break apart until Charlie’s voice broke through the trance.

“Really? In an alley? Come on, Dean, have some class.” Dean pulled away slowly before turning to Charlie.

“Can I help you?”

“Yeah, we’re leaving and unless you two wanna walk back to the hotel, I suggest you come with me.” Walking back actually sounded nice. Cas liked the idea of walking through the city with Dean. But he knew it was too risky, especially in California. Paparazzi were everywhere.

Dean seemed to have the same thought.

“Fine.” When they got to the car, Gabriel gave Cas a knowing look. Cas ignored him. His brother could think whatever he wanted. He wasn’t entirely wrong. If they hadn’t been interrupted, Cas probably would’ve been on his knees within the next five minutes. If Dean didn’t beat him to it.

They kept their distance in the car, and the entire ten-minute drive back to the hotel Cas felt like his skin was on fire. He needed Dean to touch him again. It didn’t matter in what capacity. They kept their distance in the elevator, too, and by the time Dean opened the door to his room, Cas was pretty sure he was about to spontaneously combust. The second the door closed, Cas was in Dean’s space.

“Slow,” Dean whispered against his lips. “We have all night.”

“Early day tomorrow,” Cas reminded him. Dean’s fingers trailed down his chest, undoing the buttons on his shirt as they went.

“Don’t care.” Cas apparently didn’t care either because he didn’t put up a fight. He let Dean undress him slowly. He let Dean kiss him breathless. He let Dean take him apart with careful, deliberate strokes. He knew he had to be quiet, so he sank his teeth into his bottom lip and let out a string of soft moans and whimpers. Dean kissed him, swallowing any other sounds Cas made. Cas closed his eyes and let himself go.


	23. Chapter 23

Dean had to admit, the Stanford campus was nice. What he saw of it anyway. He spent most of the time stealing glances at Cas. He couldn’t help it. After last night, and waking up together again, Dean knew. He loved him. He loved Cas and he was quietly freaking out about it. He wasn’t afraid of his feelings. He was afraid that they weren’t reciprocated. As soon as he figured it out, he wanted to talk to Charlie, but he hadn’t found time to be alone with her yet. Sam, Jessica, and Cas stopped to talk about something and Dean took the opportunity to pull Charlie aside.

“I need to talk to you when we get back. It’s nothing bad, but it’s important.”

“Are you finally gonna tell me why you’ve been jumpy all day?”

“I haven’t--.” Dean snapped his mouth shut when Charlie gave him a knowing look. Either he was being a lot more obvious about it than he’d thought, or Charlie just knew him that well.

He chose to believe the latter.

“You seem distracted,” Gabriel said when he rejoined the group.

“Just one of those days I guess,” Dean said. He forced himself not to steal a glance at Cas. Instead, he took in his surroundings. The campus really was nice, and Sam seemed happy. It made Dean smile. He was still worried about Sam moving across the country, but that would never really go away. More than anything, Dean wanted his brother to be happy, and if he had to move out to California for that to happen, then Dean wasn’t going to stop him.

*** *** ***

Dean waited for Charlie to get off the phone with Pamela before he blurted out the thing he had been trying not to say all day.

“I love him.” Charlie tucked her phone into her pocket.

“No shit. But thank you for telling me.” Dean flopped onto his bed.

“I don’t know what to do, Charlie.”

“Telling him would probably be a good first step.” He bolted up.

“No. I can’t do that.”

“Why not?”

“Because he either won’t feel the same way and it’ll get really awkward really fast, or he’ll feel obligated to say it before he’s ready. And it’s not like it matters anyway. We can’t tell anyone.”

“No, you can’t, and I’m glad you know that. But you should at least say it to each other.”

Charlie put her hand on his leg. “Dean, how long have I known you?”

“About ten years.”

“Right. And in those ten years, how many times have you been in love?”

“Counting right now? Three.”

“Right, three. If I’ve learned anything about you over the last ten years, it’s this. You love with everything you have. When you fall in love with someone, it consumes you. You need to tell him. Even if he doesn’t feel the same way, which he does, by the way, he deserves to know. He deserves to know that, of all the people on the planet, you chose him.” Dean fell back onto the bed and stared up at the ceiling. He really hated it when Charlie was right. It made it a lot harder to argue with her.

“Okay.”

“You’ll tell him?”

“Yes.”

“Good. We leave in the morning, so you better do it soon, or you might not get another chance for a while.” Before he could say anything, Charlie was out the door. She wanted him to do this now? He’d barely had a day to process. He sat up to go after her and was surprised when the door opened again.

“Charlie said you wanted to talk to me,” Cas said. He crossed the room, concern masking his face. “Are you okay? You seemed…off today.” Dean smiled weakly.

“Yeah, I’m okay, Cas.” Cas didn’t say anything. He just sat there and stared at him, and it felt like he was looking directly into Dean’s soul. Dean stared back, getting lost in the endless shades of blue in Cas’s eyes. Cas stood in front of him and ran his fingers through his hair. Dean closed his eyes for a second and leaned into the touch. Then he stood up and closed the half-step of space between them. The kiss was so soft that Dean felt something break inside him.

“Dean, are you sure you’re okay?” Dean swallowed the lump of emotions in his throat.

“I love you.” Cas blinked.

“What?”

“I love you.” Dean wasn’t sure what he was expecting, but Cas cupped his face in both hands and kissed him fiercely.

“I love you, Dean.”

“Really?” Cas nodded. His hands were still on Dean’s face.

“I thought I did, after Minnesota, but I was afraid to admit it to myself. I still am. The way I feel around you…it terrifies me in the best way. I hate being away from you and I wish we had more time together.”

“We have tonight,” Dean said.

“And in the morning, I won’t want you to leave.”

“How about we worry about that tomorrow?”

*** *** ***

Everyone said their goodbyes before they left the hotel. Sam hugged Cas and Gabriel, Jessica waved, and Gabriel gave Dean a fist bump. Cas turned to Dean with a sad smile. Dean pulled him into a tight hug.

“I told you I wouldn’t want you to leave,” Cas said.

“I love you, Cas.” Dean pulled back a little. “Remember that, okay? Always remember that.” “I will. I love you, too.”

“I’ll text you when we land in Kansas.”

“Okay.” As far as goodbye kisses went, it wasn’t noteworthy, but Dean didn’t care. He held on until he absolutely needed to breathe. And even then, he wasn’t sure the extra few seconds weren’t worth passing out for. He met Charlie by the car. Sam and Jessica were already inside. “Did you tell him?”

“I did.”

“And?”

“And it’s taking every ounce of my willpower not to run back upstairs and kiss him again.” Charlie smiled.

“Good. I know it’s not ideal, but…I have a good feeling about you two.” She got in the car and Dean followed. He spent the entire ride to the airport staring out the window, wishing he had gotten just one more kiss.


	24. Chapter 24

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me apologize in advance for this. I needed to create drama. I'm so sorry.

Cas was woken up much earlier than he wanted to be by someone banging on his door. He reached for his phone and checked the time. It was a little past eight. The banging came again, followed by,

“Cas, open the door now!” Gabriel. Cas got up and opened his door.

“What?” Gabriel shoved the newspaper into his chest.

“I told you to be careful!” Cas looked down at the newspaper in his hands. The headline staring back at him made his stomach drop. **PHOTOS** **REVEAL RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN DEAN**

 **WINCHESTER AND CASTIEL NOVAK.** Cas looked up at Gabriel.

“How--?”

“How the fuck should I know!?” Gabriel locked the door. “I got to the paper before Mom and Dad could see it, but this is all over the internet.” Cas dropped his eyes back to the paper and the picture. The alley near the restaurant in California.

“I’m screwed.”

“Yeah, no shit. Mom and Dad are gonna wanna do damage control.” Gabriel sat on Cas’s bed. “I just wanted to talk to you before anyone else got the chance. The way I see it, you’ve got two options. You either confirm everything and deal with it, or you deny it and go with whatever explanation Mom and Dad and the press team come up with.”

“I have to call Dean.”

“No.” Gabriel grabbed Cas’s phone off the nightstand before he could move. “You can’t have any contact with anyone outside of this house until the official statement is released.” Cas dropped the paper and sank to the floor, his back pressed against the door. He drew up his knees and put his head in his hands. Three weeks ago, Dean had been the first person to tell Cas he loved him and he had never been happier. Now, he was being faced with a choice he couldn’t make. Either way, he was completely screwed. He honestly felt like he could cry.

“I don’t know what to do.” Cas felt Gabriel sit beside him.

“Do you love him?” Cas swallowed.

“Yes, I do.”

“Then you know what you have to do.”

“Gabriel, I can’t!” Anger spiked in Cas’s chest and he got to his feet, his hands clutching his hair. “There isn’t a single way that no one gets out of this unscathed.” Gabriel was quiet for a minute before he said,

“I’ll think of something.”

*** *** ***

Cas was numb as he sat at the table across from Chuck and Naomi. Gabriel was sitting beside him in solidarity, but it hardly made a difference. Chuck was on the phone with someone and, judging by the expression on his face, it wasn’t going well. Naomi looked ready to commit murder and Cas was thinking that might not be such a bad thing. Gabriel had kept his phone and Cas could tell by the annoyed/nervous expression on his face that it was blowing up in his pocket. He didn’t touch it. He didn’t touch his own phone either.

“We need to do damage control,” Chuck said when he got off the phone. “Our press secretary is drafting a statement. Those pictures were obviously photoshopped and we’ll be holding the people responsible for distributing them accountable. Someone is trying to ruin our family name.”

“They weren’t photoshopped,” Cas said. There was no use in lying about it.

“Excuse me?” Naomi’s voice was always cold, but now it felt like ice.

“They weren’t photoshopped.”

“Are you saying that this was consensual?” She jabbed a pointy fingernail at the picture under the headline. Cas averted his eyes and stayed silent. “Or were you attacked?” Cas’s head shot up.

“What?”

“Did Dean Winchester assault you? Is that why you’re so quiet?” Cas looked at Gabriel, hoping maybe he had misheard, but Gabriel looked as shocked as he felt. Naomi threw the paper onto the table. “We’re releasing the statement this afternoon. Be ready.” She turned on her heel and marched out of the room. Chuck was close behind her, his phone pressed to his ear again.

“Did she just--?” Cas started.

“She did,” Gabriel confirmed.

“Do you think--?”

“I don’t know.” Cas pressed his fingers into his temples. He _had_ to call Dean. He had to talk to him before that press release. If Naomi was about to do what he was pretty sure she was about to do, Dean needed to know. He needed to know that it didn’t come from him. Gabriel put his hand on his shoulder.

“What do I do?”

“Right now, just breathe.”

“I can’t believe I let this happen.”

“Cas, blaming yourself isn’t gonna make it any better. You didn’t know. Neither did he. These things happen.” Cas thought back to what Dean had said to him before he left California. _I_ _love you. Always remember that_. That was all he had to hold on to until Gabriel gave him his phone back.

“I can’t do this.”

“Come on.” Gabriel tugged on his arm. “Sitting here all day thinking about it isn’t gonna help. Let’s go watch a movie. Don’t worry about it until later.”

It wasn’t a bad idea, but Cas couldn’t focus. All he could think was that Dean was probably spamming his phone and completely freaked out that he wasn’t answering. He was almost fairly certain that Mary Winchester was handling this situation much differently. He didn’t have to worry about Dean, but he knew Dean was worrying about him and Cas was worrying about the press conference. Gabriel didn’t seem to be doing much better. He was staring at the TV, but his fingers were tapping a mile a minute against his leg. It was clear he wanted to check his phone. Sam was probably blowing him up wondering why Cas wasn’t answering Dean.

Time moved too quickly and crawled by at the same time. It felt like years before Cas was told to get dressed for the press conference, but then the next thing he knew he was being put in the back of a car and driven to City Hall. Apparently, when Chuck meant press conference, he meant _press_ _conference_ , with as many local and national reporters as he could gather. For the first time in his life, Cas was actually scared to be in front of that many people. Dean’s words echoed in his head. _I_ _love you. Always remember that_. Cas took a deep breath, steeled his nerves, and stepped out of the car.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, I am so sorry. Feel free to yell at me in the comments.
> 
> I would also like to apologize for not responding to comments like I normally do. I think my jobs are conspiring to kill me. I haven't had a day off in a month. I am very tired. But I am reading all of them and they all make me smile. I love you guys. 💕💕💕💕


	25. Chapter 25

Dean turned off the TV and stared at the black screen. His mother was still in with Charlie and Pamela and a few members of the press team. He knew they’d seen it. Whatever statement they had been planning to make was useless now. They had to play defense. Dean closed his eyes. If he tried hard enough, he could almost imagine this wasn’t happening. Next to him, Sam said,

“Dean, are you--?” Dean was off the couch and out the back door before his brother finished the sentence. Of course he wasn’t okay. How the fuck could he _possibly_ be okay? The press was camped out in front of the house, so Dean had to go out back to smoke, which he had been doing a lot since the news broke, but he was almost tempted to walk out there and say exactly what he wanted. He couldn’t do that, though. His mother was tolerant, but he had to do this by the book. He lit a cigarette and started pacing.

He had been blowing up Cas’s phone since he found out. He never got a response. Now he knew why. His chest ached and his stomach was churning. He couldn’t tell if he wanted to scream or cry. Maybe both. Cas had really just gone on national TV and stood there while his father publicly accused Dean of assault. He hadn’t looked the least bit comfortable about it, but that didn’t matter. Dean’s phone started ringing in his pocket. He pulled it out.

“What?”

“Dean, I’m sorry. I know you saw it and I’m sorry. There was nothing I could do.” Dean scoffed.

“You could’ve told the truth. But I guess law school being paid for is more important than me, right?”

“Dean, please. I didn’t know…I didn’t think…”

“No, you didn’t. You were only thinking about yourself. Forget that your father just lied on national TV. Forget the campaigns. Forget everything. Do you realize what this is gonna do to me? Do you even care?”

“Of course I care. Dean, I love you. You have to believe that.” He wanted to. He wanted to believe that Cas loved him, but how could he?

“How can I? You could’ve said something. _Anything_. You can’t tell me you love me and then choose a free ride to college over me. That’s not how this works.”

“I didn’t _choose_ anything! All I was told was that I had to be at the press conference. No one told me anything.”

“That doesn’t matter! As soon as he said that, you should’ve stopped him! You should’ve set it right and you didn’t! Maybe you do care about me, but not more than you care about yourself.”

“That’s not true, Dean.”

“You know what, Cas? We’re done. You did what you had to do and I’m doing what I have to do. Bye.”

“Dean, wait--.”

“Goodbye, Castiel.” Dean ended the call and blocked the number. He lit a second cigarette and sat on the back steps. His phone was still blowing up in his pocket and he knew it was his friends checking in on him. He ignored it. What was he supposed to say? He was halfway through his second cigarette when he heard the door open. A second later Sam was sitting beside him.

“So you’re just gonna send yourself to an early grave?”

“Might as well. My life’s over.”

“Dean--.”

“Sam, Charles Novak just publicly accused me of assaulting his son. And Cas didn’t deny it. My life is over. Even if Mom can set the record straight, something like that doesn’t just go away.” Dean flicked some ash off his cigarette. “I’m stepping back from the campaign. There're less than two months left. You and Mom can handle it. I’ll be there when she makes her statement, but after that, I’m done. Win or lose, I’m staying here. Mom’ll go to DC if she wins and you’ll be at Stanford, but I’m staying. Maybe I’ll get my own apartment closer to the garage.”

“Dean, you can’t just give up.”

“Give up what? Sam, have you told Jess you love her yet?” Sam nodded. “And she said it back?” Another nod. “Okay, then maybe you can understand this. I told him I loved him, and you know I don’t say that lightly. He told me he loved me and then he stood there while his father told lies that’ll ruin my life. All because he wants his parents to pay for college. I didn’t have a problem keeping us a secret, but now that it’s out, he should’ve owned it.”

“I know you’re upset, and you have every right to be, but you can’t just step back from everything and pretend none of it ever happened. You’re right, you don’t use ‘love’ lightly, which means I know you still care about him. Gabe told me Cas is sick over this. He does love you, Dean.”

“You’re still talking to Gabriel?”

“Yeah, he told me they were on communications lockdown until the press conference. He texted me as soon as it was over. He told me Cas called you.”

“Give me your phone.”

“What?”

“Give me your phone.”

“Why?”

“Either give me your phone or block his number yourself. You are, under no circumstances, allowed to contact him anymore.”

“Excuse me?”

“You heard me.”

“You don’t get to decide who my friends are. You can be mad at Cas all you want, but that doesn’t give you the right to control my life.”

“After what Cas just did, how can you still consider Gabriel a friend?”

“Cas didn’t do anything. His father did. If you wanna be mad at someone, be mad at Charles. Be mad that he slandered your name. Be mad that he’s forcibly keeping Cas in the closet. Be mad that he would rather the country think his son was attacked than know he’s in love with you.” Dean flicked his cigarette butt into the grass and went back inside. Sam was right, but he wasn’t ready to accept it. Pamela and his mother were waiting for him in the living room.

“Tell the press whatever you want,” he said bitterly. “Once this is over, I’m done.”

“Sweetheart, are you okay?”

“You know, I’m really not. But no one really seems to care how I feel about the whole thing. So just do whatever you have to do.” He stormed into his room and slammed the door. A tidal wave of emotions crashed over him and he did the only thing he could think to do. He put his fist through the wall. He looked down at his bloody knuckles. It hurt, but at least he was feeling something now. A soft knock came at the door before Pamela came in.

“Dean, I need you to tell me what happened.”

“You wanna know what happened? I met someone and I fell in love with him and he told me that he loved me too and then he betrayed me in front of the entire country.”

“You love him?”

“Yeah. I mean, I did, anyway.” Pamela nodded.

“Why did you tell me?”

“Because you would’ve told Mom and she would’ve told me I couldn’t see him and I would’ve kept seeing him anyway and then something exactly like this would’ve happened and I would’ve been in even more trouble than I already am.” Dean was surprised when Pamela took his uninjured hand.

“Dean, I’ve been working with your mother since you were still in diapers. If there’s one thing I know, she never would’ve told you to stop seeing him. She might’ve asked you to take a step back from the campaign, but she would never tell you who you can and can’t date. I wish you would’ve told me. I could’ve arranged more controlled meetings.” Dean blinked.

“You would’ve helped me?” Pamela smacked him in the back of the head.

“That’s my job, dumbass. Believe it or not, all I want is for you and Sam to be happy. If you had told me how serious you were about him, I would’ve helped you.” Dean released a long breath.

“Okay. So what do we do now?”


	26. Chapter 26

The first twenty-four hours after the press conference were hazy at best. Cas was confined to the house, but he didn’t really mind. He just locked himself in his bedroom. Gabriel had given him his phone back the second he got back home, but after the initial call to Dean, it was radio silence. According to Sam, who was still in touch with Gabriel, Dean was beyond pissed. Cas didn’t blame him. He was actually surprised Dean had even answered his call. It had been so good to hear his voice, but by the time Dean had hung up on him, Cas was crying.

“He’ll come around,” Gabriel said. He was only trying to help, Cas knew that, but in the moment all he could do was glare at his brother.

“He will _never_ forgive me for this, Gabriel. He thinks I chose Chuck and Naomi’s money over him.”

“So set the record straight.”

“What?”

“Call another press conference. Tell Dad you wanna make a statement, and set the record straight on what happened.”

“And get kicked out? Or worse? You know they donate money to at _least_ four different conversion camps. Is that where you want me to end up? Tortured until I pretend I’m something I’m not?”

“We can go to California,” Gabriel said. “I’ve been talking to Balthazar. He’s got a place. Three bedrooms, right near Stanford. He’s just waiting on us.”

“And how am I supposed to pay for college? If I take out loans, I’ll be in debt for the rest of my life.” Gabriel sighed.

“Do you trust me?”

“Yes, of course.”

“Then just…do what I say and I promise everything will be fine.”

*** *** ***

Gabriel was absolutely out of his mind, but Cas didn’t have any other options. Two weeks had passed since the press conference, the first debate was next week, and Cas was desperate. Gabriel had been keeping close contact with Sam and apparently Dean was slipping a little more every day. Mary Winchester had released an official statement saying that her son was being falsely accused and appropriate measures were going to be taken. Cas wasn’t quite sure what that meant, but Chuck had been yelling into his phone a lot more lately.

Cas spent the entire two weeks in his room. Gabriel brought him food and sat with him sometimes, but mostly he just stayed in bed and waited for a call from Dean that would never come. He had never been in love before and now he wasn’t sure he ever wanted to be again. Being with Dean had been intense, but the knowledge that they would never be together again made him feel like he was drowning. He couldn’t breathe. Every inhale was more painful than the last and every exhale made the ache in his chest that much greater.

“You need to eat something,” Gabriel said gently. Cas rolled over in bed.

“Not hungry.”

“Can you just eat some toast for me?” Cas sat up a little. He picked up a piece of toast and nibbled on it. He wasn’t hungry. He was nauseous. Gabriel sat next to him. “You gonna get up today?” Cas shook his head. “Okay. Well, I’ve been talking to Mom and Dad. They’re gonna call another press conference as soon as you’re ready.”

“What’s the point, Gabe? I can stand in front of the press and tell them that Chuck lied and clear Dean’s name, but the damage is done. He’ll never forgive me.”

“I’m sorry. But I think you owe it to him to tell the truth.” Cas swallowed harder than he needed to. Gabriel was right. He did owe Dean that, at least. He pulled the blankets tighter around him.

“Tomorrow.”

“Are you sure?”

“It’s been two weeks. I have to do it soon.”

“Okay. I’ll let them know. Are you gonna be okay?”

“I don’t know.” Gabriel nodded. He gave Cas a hug and left the room. Cas stared at the plate his brother had left on the bed. He knew he needed to eat. He picked up his phone. He had a couple texts from Meg asking if he was okay. Nothing from Dean. He put his phone back down and picked up the plate.

*** *** ***

“Feel a little better?” Cas rubbed the towel over his hair.

“Actually, yes.”

“Good. Here.” Gabriel held up a hanger. “Wear this until you get there. Change just before you have to speak.” Cas took the suit. Gabriel had gone over the plan with him before he got in the shower. He would ride in the car with Chuck and Naomi. The press secretary had drafted another speech, but Cas wouldn’t be using it. He would be using the one Gabriel had helped him write. He would show up in a suit and keep up the appearance of the perfect son right up until he went in front of the press. After that, he would figure out his next move based on how Chuck and Naomi reacted.

“Okay.”

“Nervous?”

“Yes, but I need to do this.”

“I’ll be right there.”

“You’re coming with me?”

“I’m gonna take a cab. Depending on how Mom and Dad react, you’re gonna need me there.” Cas took a deep breath.

“Okay. Thank you, Gabe.”

“Don’t thank me. You’re my brother and I’m proud of you for doing this. I know this isn’t how you wanted to tell people, but you’ll feel better once you do.”

“I know.” Gabriel left the room and Cas changed into the suit. It was a perfect fit and for once it wasn’t itchy. He actually didn’t want to take it off. But the point of this press conference was for him to be honest with himself. That meant dressing the way he wanted to. He grabbed his bag and left his room. In the hallway, Gabriel handed him a folded up piece of paper. His speech. He had it committed to memory, mostly, but Chuck and Naomi were expecting him to be unprepared.

“You got this, Cas,” Gabriel said.

“I hope so.”

“Castiel, are you ready?” Naomi asked.

“Yes, ma’am.”

“You’ll be stronger after this,” Naomi said and Gabriel covered his mouth to stifle his laugh. Cas smiled.

“I know.”


	27. Chapter 27

Dean was sitting on his bed, eating ice cream straight from the container and sulking, when Sam burst in the door.

“Dean, you have to see this.”

“Not interested,” Dean said. Whatever it was, it probably wasn’t important. Sam had been trying to get Dean out of his room for two weeks. He had been holed up in his room since the Novaks gave their press conference. He didn’t want to deal with the world. Sam took the ice cream from him and dragged him out of bed.

"You _have_ to see this.”

“I hate you,” Dean grumbled as Sam pulled him into the living room. He had the TV paused on what looked like a press conference. “Sam, I don’t wanna watch anything having to do with the election.”

“Just shut up and watch.” Sam unpaused the TV. Cas was standing in front of the cameras wearing jeans and a t-shirt that Dean had thought he lost months ago. He sat up a little straighter. Sam turned the TV up a little when Cas started to speak.

“Hello. My name is Castiel Novak. Two weeks ago, my father stood where I’m standing now and accused Dean Winchester of assaulting me after photos surfaced implying that we were in a relationship. I’m standing here today to tell you that my father lied. The truth is, Dean Winchester is my boyfriend. For those of you wondering why I didn’t speak up early, I should have. I should never have let my father stand here and slander Dean’s good name, but I was scared. I, like many people, was scared of what my family would do if they knew the truth. However, by staying silent, I have done irreparable damage to Dean’s reputation and I’ve hurt the man I love. I don’t know what’s going to happen today after this, but I do know one thing. I love Dean Winchester, and I’m not afraid to say that. I’m not afraid to tell people that I’m gay. Sexuality is not a choice and I’m tired of people, myself included, being forced to stay in the closet for appearance sake.” Dean got up and bolted for the door.

“Dean!” Sam shouted, but he wasn’t listening. He grabbed his keys off the table and jumped into Baby. Even speeding, it was well over a six-hour drive to Chicago. He didn’t stop. He crossed into the city limits a little after seven. It was only then that he realized he didn’t have a plan. He pulled into a parking lot and took out his phone.

**Sammy [5:13pm]:** I told Gabe you were on your way. He told Cas to meet you here. 

The attached address was only a few blocks away. Dean steadied his breathing.

**Dean [7:04pm]:** Thanks 

He pulled up to the bar and cut Baby’s engine. He took a minute to collect himself before he walked in. He scanned the room and saw Cas sitting at a table near the back, nursing a drink. He pushed his way through the crowd. Cas jumped up the moment they locked eyes. He closed the remaining distance between them and Dean caught him in a hug. He was still mad, but having Cas back in his arms felt right.

“I’m so sorry, Dean.” Cas was definitely crying. Dean held him tighter. He rested his hand on the nape of Cas’s neck and kissed his temple. He knew he couldn’t just let him off the hook, but he was finding it harder to stay mad the longer Cas stayed in his arms.

“Let me buy you a drink,” he said when Cas pulled away.

“You’re still mad.” Dean motioned to the table and they sat across from each other.

“I am. Cas, I’m so mad at you. I can’t even…you don’t know what that did to me. But I know it wasn’t easy for you to do what you did today and I appreciate it.”

“Can you forgive me? I’m not asking you to take me back. I know I don’t deserve that, but I’m asking you not to hate me.”

“Cas…” Dean sighed. “I don’t hate you. I love you. Even after this, I still love you. And I

don’t know what kind of person that makes me, but I don’t really care.” Cas finally pulled his eyes away from the table.

“So you forgive me?” Dean shook his head.

“Not yet. But…I don’t wanna lose you.” Dean reached across the table and put his hand over Cas’s. “I don’t know where we go from here.”

“Can I buy you dinner?”

“Yeah, that sounds good.”

They ate in relatively comfortable silence. Cas looked like he was waiting for Dean to say something and Dean didn’t know what to say. After Cas paid, they walked outside together.

They ducked into an alley to smoke.

“I’m guessing you’re off the campaign trail,” Dean said to break the silence. Cas snorted.

“Off the campaign, cut off from my family, and hopefully out of the state tomorrow.”

“Where are you going?”

“California. Gabriel and I are moving in with our cousin.” Cas studied his cigarette. “I got into Stanford.” Dean smiled in spite of himself.

“Knew you would. How are you gonna pay for it?”

“Gabe said he’d take care of it. I don’t know what that means. Did Sam get in?” A stab of guilt hit. He hadn’t even asked. He was too busy feeling sorry for himself.

“I have no idea. I should ask him.”

“I’m sure he did. He’s smart.” Cas took a long drag. “I’m really sorry, Dean. I should’ve said something when it happened. I should’ve stopped him. Hell, I should’ve just told them the truth upfront instead of letting them draw their own conclusions. I was just so scared. Not about law school. About what Chuck and Naomi might do. Cutting me off was the best possible outcome. I was scared they might…” Cas didn’t finish his sentence, but he was shaking. Dean moved closer and hugged him. “I’m so sorry. I love you, Dean. I promise I do.”

“Hey,” Dean whispered, “it’s okay. Cas, it’s okay. I should’ve let you talk when you called me. I was angry and I just assumed you cared more about school than you did about me. I should’ve given you more credit than that.” Cas shook his head and hugged him tighter.

“You were right to be mad. You shouldn’t even be here right now. I don’t deserve you.”

“That’s not true.” Dean pulled away a little so he could cup Cas’s face. His cheeks were wet with tears. Cas leaned into the touch. “I’m still mad, but…would it be okay if I kissed you?”

“Yes.” Dean took a half-step forward and pressed his lips against Cas’s. Cas opened up to it, his tongue brushing gently against Dean’s. Dean backed Cas against the wall and kissed him deeply. He had every intention of making it short and sweet, but as soon as they started, Dean couldn’t stop. Cas was addicting and after two weeks of absolutely no contact he didn’t realize how much he needed it. “I missed you.”

“I missed you, too.”

“I don’t have to go home tonight,” Dean said. Cas stared at him.

“Are you sure?” Dean nodded, already pulling Cas towards Baby. “Dean, we don’t--.”

“I need you, Cas. Please.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I realize it's not possible to drive for six hours without stopping for gas, especially in Dean's car, but we're gonna pretend it is


	28. Chapter 28

Cas tucked his hands into the pockets of his jacket. He wasn’t used to being at campaign events in anything other than a suit. He liked it. He felt more relaxed. That probably also had something to do with the lack of nitpicking and the fact that he wasn’t being reminded about posture every five seconds. Next to him, Gabriel seemed just as relaxed. On his other side, Dean was drumming his fingers on his leg. He looked bored.

“You look good in his clothes,” Gabriel whispered. Cas rolled his eyes.

“Not the time.” He shifted in his seat and looked down at his t-shirt. It was worn and faded and it smelled like Dean. So did the jacket he was wearing. Cas hadn’t been back to Chuck and Naomi’s house since the press conference. Gabriel went back once to get both of their stuff. They moved out to California that weekend. The only reason they were in New York now was because they wanted to be there to support Mary Winchester. Cas also wanted to spite Chuck. Which was why they were all sitting in the front row and Cas was quite visibly holding Dean’s hand. Dean leaned into his space.

“You should wear my clothes more.” Cas laughed quietly.

“Not now, Dean.”

“Come on, Cas.” Dean leaned closer and touched his lips to the spot just below Cas’s ear. “Oh my God, Dean,” Sam said. “Get a fucking room.”

“Language,” Dean chided.

“He’s so much worse at school,” Jessica said from Sam’s other side. Sam turned to her.

“Why? Why would you do that?”

“Because she’s my spy,” Dean said. He reached around Sam and squeezed Jessica’s shoulder.

“I hate you,” Sam grumbled.

“Don’t worry, Sam,” Gabriel said. “Dean’ll be out in California in a few months and then he can watch you himself.”

“Great. Thank you, Gabriel. That helps me.” Cas laughed.

“I’ll keep him distracted for you.” Dean pulled Cas closer and kissed his temple. Cas leaned into it. It felt weird, being with Dean out in the open. The backlash from his press conference had hit Chuck more than it had him and Cas was grateful for that. He could love Dean publicly and no one said a damn word about it. Except for Gabriel because apparently part of being an older brother meant being constantly annoying. Cas didn’t mind his brother’s teasing so much. It reminded him that his relationship with Dean was real.

*** *** ***

“Do you have to go back to California tonight?” Dean was leaning across the table, his hand covering Cas’s.

“I guess I could stay until tomorrow. Gabe’s flying back tonight with Sam and Jessica. They shouldn’t miss me.” Dean smiled.

“Good. I think I want you to myself tonight. I kinda like you.” Cas smiled back.

“I kinda like you, too.” Dean traced nonsensical patterns on the back of Cas’s hand. Cas got lost in the soft look in Dean’s eyes.

“How’s school going?” Cas shook his head.

“I don’t want to talk about school right now. I’m here to forget about that for a few hours.” Dean nodded.

“Okay. I can help with that.” Dean flagged down the waiter and paid for dinner.

“You don’t have to do that.”

“Yeah, well, I want to. Maybe you can make it up to me later.” They walked out onto the street and ducked into an alley. “Thanks for coming tonight.” Cas smiled.

“You’re welcome, Dean. Although, it was more for me than for you.”

“I know. And I’m proud of you for that.”

“I never thought I’d be here. Not this soon, anyway.” Cas breathed out some smoke. “Thank you.”

“For what?”

“Being you. I don’t think things would’ve played out like this if it had been anyone else. Or if you weren’t exactly who you are.”

“You wouldn’t’ve been as reckless and none of this would’ve happened,” Dean said on an exhale.

“That’s not what I meant. Well, it was, but it’s a good thing. I would’ve spent the next four years in the closet if it wasn’t for you. All I was thinking about was getting where I wanted to be. I thought my career was more important than being who I am.”

“Your career is still important, Cas.”

“I know. But now I can focus on school without worrying that Chuck and Naomi might find out and cut me off.” Dean smirked.

“Yeah, but now you have a much bigger distraction.” Cas laughed.

“Sure, Dean, but only on the weekends. And Sam takes a lot of your time.”

“Hey, I only have two days to fulfill my older brother duties _and_ my boyfriend duties. That’s not nearly enough time.”

“Are you still thinking about moving after the election?” They had talked about it a few times, and Cas was secretly hoping he would, but he didn’t want to push. Dean would do what he felt was right.

“I think so. It makes sense. Win or lose, Mom’ll still have her people. And me and Sam can visit on holidays and over breaks. Sam needs his freedom, but I wanna be close in case something does happen. And it would be nice to see you more often. I kinda hate the long-distance thing.”

“Me too. We could--.” Cas cut off his sentence. It was way too soon to ask.

“We could what?”

“Nothing, never mind.” Dean put out his cigarette and stepped closer.

“What, sweetheart?” Cas gravitated closer out of reflex, his hand sweeping up into Dean’s hair.

“We could move in together. If you decide to move out there.” Dean grinned.

“Well, I think you just made my decision for me. I’d love to move in with you.” He slipped his arms around Cas’s waist. “We could get a little apartment close to campus. I could drive you to school every day and we could have lunch dates. And when you fall asleep on the couch while you’re studying, I can take you to bed so you don’t wake up with a weird crick in your neck.” Cas kissed Dean to get him to stop rambling.

“That sounds perfect. I love you, Dean.”

“I love you, Cas. I will absolutely move in with you.”

“Gabe and Balt are gonna be devastated.”

“I think they’ll survive.”

“They’ll have to. If you move out there, I’ll be over at your place most of the time anyway.”

“So we’re doing this?”

“Definitely.” Cas smiled and kissed Dean again.


	29. Chapter 29

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter y'all

SIX MONTHS LATER

“Dean, stop!” Sam yelled, but he was laughing. Dean grinned and smacked him over the head with the empty paper towel roll. “Cas, your boyfriend is hitting me!”

“So hit him back!” Gabriel said from the kitchen. He came out with two paper towel rolls taped together. “Here. Defend yourself!” Sam grabbed it and lunged at Dean. He jumped back.

“Hey, that’s not fair!”

“Boys, behave,” Jessica said. “What are you two even doing?”

“I was packing and he started hitting me!” Sam said. He crossed the room and Jessica wrapped in a protective hug. Dean rolled his eyes, but he was smiling. Sam had grown up a lot in the last six months, but he was still a kid at heart. Dean was thankful for that. Cas walked out of the bedroom with a suitcase and a duffle over his shoulder.

“Dean, have you even started packing?”

“My stuff’s down in Baby. Relax, sweetheart.” He kissed Cas’s temple. “We’ve got a three-day drive ahead of us. You can’t be all clenchy.”

“Remind me why we can’t just fly?” Gabriel said.

“Because road trips are fun!”

“And Dean’s scared of planes,” Sam said.

“Didn’t you fly all the time during the campaign?”

“Yeah, he white-knuckled every single flight. I had to hold his hand.”

“Okay, one, you didn’t _have_ to do anything. B, you didn’t hold my hand, you grabbed my arm. Big difference.” Sam rolled his eyes.

“Whatever, Dean. We should get going.” Sam helped Dean load Baby while Cas and Jessica did one last sweep of the apartment to make sure they hadn’t forgotten anything. Gabriel was sitting in the back with his feet up on the seat.

“Hey!” Dean snapped his fingers. “Feet on the floor.”

“Jeez, okay. Anal much?”

“Your feet weren’t on the floor last week,” Cas pointed out.

“Yeah, but I didn’t have shoes on. Or socks.”

“God, Dean, why!?” Sam groaned. “I’ll _walk_ to DC.” Dean laughed and ruffled Sam’s ever-growing hair.

“Come on, kid. Backseat.”

“Hey, I always get shotgun!”

“Not today you don’t.” Cas put his hand on Sam’s shoulder.

“We can switch in a few hours. Road trips have a habit of making me tired.”

“You’ve obviously never been on a road trip with Dean.”

“Rule number one,” Dean said.

“Driver picks the music, shotgun shuts his cakehole,” Cas finished with a small smile and Dean grinned.

“I love you.”

“Can we go?” Gabriel complained from the back.

*** *** ***

“Dean, for once in your life, eat a vegetable," Sam said. "It won’t kill you.”

“You can’t tell me what to do,” Dean said. “I’m older than you.”

“He’s not wrong,” Cas said.

“Bite me, Novak.”

“Maybe later, if you’re good.”

“And I’m not hungry anymore,” Sam said, pushing his plate away.

“Yeah, because you’re eating rabbit food.”

“Boys, for once, behave,” Jessica chided. She pecked Sam on the cheek.

“Excuse me, where’s my kiss?” Cas rolled his eyes and brushed his lips against Dean’s cheek.

“There. Now both of you quit it so we can eat.”

They were back on the road forty-five minutes later. Dean popped his favorite cassette in the player and turned the volume up. Cas rested his head on his shoulder and Dean put an arm around him. He forgot for a minute that there were three other people in the car. His world narrowed down to him and Cas and nothing else. He reached up and curled his fingers in Cas’s hair.

“Hey, lover boy,” Gabriel said, “eyes on the road or let someone else drive. I wanna live.” Dean’s eyes snapped back to the road. He hadn’t even realized he hadn’t been paying attention. It probably was a good idea to have someone else drive, but the only time anyone was allowed behind the wheel of his baby was when he was physically incapable of driving. And the few months he spent teaching Sam to drive. Cas shifted closer, curling into Dean’s side.

*** *** ***

“I thought you would never make it out here!” Dean gave his mother a hug.

“Come on, Mom, we made great time!”

“Dean is a maniac and shouldn’t have a driver’s license,” Gabriel said. He went for a handshake, but Mary pulled him into a hug. She hugged everyone else and ushered them inside.

“You’ve gotten so tall, Sam.”

“It’s been three months, Mom.”

“You’re growing like a weed,” Dean said. “You need to stop. You’re tall enough.”

“You’re just mad that I’m taller than you.”

“Watch it, kid. I can still kick your ass.”

“Why can’t you boys ever be nice to each other?” Mary asked.

“They’re like that all the time,” Jessica said.

“Sam, tell your girlfriend to stop snitching.” Jessica smiled angelically.

“It’s cute how you think Sam can tell me what to do.” She had a point. Their relationship had a good balance, but both he and Sam knew better than to argue with a woman. Especially one who could probably kill them without leaving any evidence. Sam put his arm around Jessica’s waist and pulled her close. Dean smiled a little.

Cas fell into a conversation with Mary, and Sam and Jessica were unpacking their suitcases, so Dean stepped outside for a cigarette. He was surprised when Gabriel joined him a minute later.

“Uh, hey.”

“Hey.” Gabriel leaned against a tree. “I wanted to thank you.”

“For what?”

“Not giving up on Cas. I know you were pissed, and I don’t blame you, but I never thanked you for giving my brother a second chance. He’s a genius, but he’s not always the brightest when it comes to…feelings. He thought you’d never forgive him.” Dean blew out a long stream of smoke.

“I probably shouldn’t have, but I knew he meant what he said at his press conference. I knew what he was risking. He got lucky that everything came back on your dad and not him. And I love him.”

“I know you do.” Gabriel smiled. “You’re good for him.”

“Gabe, leave my boyfriend alone,” Cas said from the doorway. Gabriel rolled his eyes.

“And I’m leaving.” He went back inside. Cas shook his head.

“He wasn’t bothering you, was he?”

“Actually, no. But I’m glad you’re out here. We haven’t been alone in three days.”

“We’re still not alone,” Cas pointed out. Dean flicked his cigarette butt into the grass and moved into Cas’s space. “Dean, come on.”

“Just one. Please?” Cas sighed.

“One.” Dean leaned in and pressed his lips against Cas’s. Dean held on until he felt dizzy. He didn’t want to break the kiss. When they eventually parted, Cas smiled softly. “We have to go back in.” Dean knew he was right, but he didn’t want to. He stayed in Cas’s arms for another few minutes before they went back inside.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you all enjoyed reading this is as much as I enjoyed writing it!

**Author's Note:**

> This fic is complete and will be updated on Wednesdays and Sundays


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